Another year dusted under the rug!

It’s the time of the year when we constantly see crossed off dates because we’re still writing 2017 instead of 2018- a little reminder that we’re still stuck in our past. We’re still haunted by our past actions, decisions and heartbreaks.

Quoting Alfred Lord Tennyson,

Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come, whispering, it will be happier.

It’s easy to assume that nothing will change - being pessimistic is convenient. High expectations often lead to disappointment but not looking forward to anything robs us from hope itself.

If time- something that is grand and immortal- can bow down to the slight change in numbers and admit: “Yes, this is a new opportunity”, why can’t we believe that there is a shift? Maybe the shift will change the way you’re going to look at time. Not as something that is constantly passing but as a constant reminder of breaths. Each moment, each breath holds so much opportunity. Don’t miss out on that.

I’ve had a lot of long drawn sad moments in 2017. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. I left my jobs and university because my entire world was crumbling. I flew back to India and moped. I moped for days, hoping that one day I’ll wake up and I’ll just be happy.

All this while, I didn’t work towards that happiness. I would curse time, tell it move faster so that I can reach my destination but I had never boarded the train. You can’t expect time to heal you if you don’t work with it.

I kept waiting for the sorrow to pass, but what I never realized was that the sorrow stayed because I held on to it. We often hold on to sorrow because it gives us meaning- at least, mine did. My sadness would elevate my writing, it would make me feel the depths of human emotion but mostly, it would make my self-pitying relevant.

However, no matter how much it helped- it sucked to be upset 24/7. So I waited, promising myself that I’ll work on myself when there is a significant change. That change would never come, you have to go look for it.

So, this year, I promised to let everything go. I made myself believe that this is the change I’ve been waiting for. It’s a new year.

I took steps to ameliorate my mental health- I saw a counsellor, I started yoga and I felt a change.

I could see myself getting better. I would wake up and the morning sun would energize me. Its rays would fill my room with hope, warmth and a promise of a better tomorrow.

Each day has 24 hours, each hour had 60 minutes and each minute had 60 seconds and I could finally feel them. Every time the clock tick-tocked, I was offered a brand new opportunity. It has made me feel invincible!

I guess, the point of this story wasn’t to regale you guys with my road to recovery. I just wanted to reiterate the importance of hope. Every year gives you a starting point.

True, maybe you still have the same job and your relationships might still be falling apart but a new year brings a ray of hope. It allows you to breathe in the warmth and promise to yourself that this year, I’ll work with every second of the day to reach where I want to be.

It’s the first platform for the train journey ahead.

So pack your bags, fellas and abroad the train to a happier tomorrow.