Into the darkness- A bittersweet love story

Chapter 1 Beginnings and Endings.

This is the first installment or chapter of my story as a targeted individual which I hope to post in installments. I hope that you enjoy it.

My life can be divided into two. My life before Lucy and my life after Lucy. Before Lucy my life was normal, it made sense, but after Lucy nothing makes sense anymore and I am so lost. I am writing my story in the hopes that I can finally free myself from his grip, although I think that he is like quicksand, the harder I struggle and fight him, the harder I fall for him. Still, it is my hope that by writing my story that I can exorcise myself of this man because missing him is the worst thing, it's like an endless abyss. Without him I feel like I can't go on and I feel like I will never be happy again, yet life keeps going on and on with no relief in sight. So maybe by telling my story I can cleanse myself of the taint that is Lucy and somehow move on with my life.

Three, almost four years ago my life made sense and I was happy. I lived in the suburbs, I had a boyfriend who I loved and things were coming along just as life often does. Now my life is in disarray, nothing makes any sense and I am just surviving, a mere shadow of the woman I used to be. And the pain of missing Lucy is almost too much to bear and there is no relief in sight. But the story of losing Lucy, comes later, as this is the story of how I fell in love and lost my heart to an evil, cold hearted, ruthless black magician who cast a spell on me. It is my journey into the darkness and of madness. So please indulge me a minute while I tell you my story.

Even now I am not sure if my story is true, I am not sure whether Lucy was real or whether Lucy and all that happened to me was just a figment of my imagination. There always was that element of plausible deniability to what happened to me. And this is the most frustrating thing, did it really happen or did I just make it all up? It could have been true, but on the other hand, it could have just been a figment of my diseased imagination. However, there was a lot that suggested that this was actually something that happened to me and that it was real, so I will present this story to you as it seemed to happen to me. Furthermore, I am sure that that my imagination isn't that good to just make up a man such as Lucy, he had a real depth of character and seemed very real indeed. And as they say, perception is reality and maybe in this case, that is the truth of the matter. As I said, I hope that by telling my story I can exorcise myself of the demon that is Lucy, find some happiness again and make some sense of my life. Hopefully then I can pick up the pieces of my life and continue with some measure of happiness. Lucy has a great deal of power over me and hopefully by telling my story and exposing this darkness to the light, I can be free again from his destructive power.

My story begins with a conversation with my boyfriend. We were sitting alone in the lounge-room and he said, “I saw something really weird the other night”. “What did you see?” I asked. He said that Kallie my cat was chasing something small in the lounge-room late one night, when suddenly he saw a small creature that was transparent run out from under the stool where Kallie had chased it, clear across the room where it disappeared. I knew at once what he was talking about, he was talking about a creature that I hadn't seen since I was a child, a faerie. I hadn't told anyone about the faeries but when I was little I used to see them all of the time. I even used to build little faerie houses and altars and leave the faeries offerings of flowers and feathers as presents. I knew instinctively not to mention to anyone that I could see faeries and I hadn't seen one for years but as soon as my boyfriend described what he had seen in the lounge-room I was sure that it was a faerie. We discussed it and I told my boyfriend of the faeries that I used to see as a child and we agreed that it was pretty strange that he had seen one of these little creatures in the house.

A few days later I was in the garden and I was following my boyfriend back into the house when I looked down towards his feet and saw a faerie. I was most surprised but I was totally sure of what I had seen. It was a little dark creature with dark clothing and features and it was following my boyfriend back into the house. A day or two later I saw another faerie, this time in the bedroom. I decided then and there to build a faerie house in the front garden and to leave an offering to the faeries as they had obviously come to visit. Later that day, I took some spare bricks and a small piece of wood and cleared a spot in the front garden, where I built a faerie house. I then picked some flowers and left them there for the faeries. I think that they were pleased at this.

I started seeing faeries all of the time and what is more, was that I was channelling them too. We were in definite communication and I was very pleased to be back in communication with the faeries. It was a bit different dealing with faeries as an adult compared to when I was a kid. When I was a kid, I used to spy on them and leave them offerings of flowers, feathers and rocks in faerie houses and altars that I had built. The faeries knew that I was there but they let me do what I liked as I never held them any ill will. However, in dealing with the faeries as an adult I had to lay down some ground rules, especially since they were in the house. Faeries can be mischievous and play lots of tricks, which is part of my attraction to them I guess, so it was important to have some rules. I was especially strict about no magic inside the house, the faeries knew that I considered this to be my home, my sanctuary and to never abuse that, which they didn't. The faeries were really curious about humans generally but were particularly curious about how our society thought about certain things such as the environment and love.

I really enjoyed having the faeries back in my life, as they were so positive, so wise, so in tune with our Goddess Earth, and living the right life, this is true even of the dark ones who I was wary off. I felt sure that I was blessed to have the faeries back in my life. The faeries had always watched over me as a child, my mother used to like to tell a story about when I was a baby and it was late at night and I had been asleep in my crib when mum heard me laughing and went to my door to investigate. Where she was surprised to see dancing coloured lights under the door with me laughing in delight. When she opened the door she saw nothing but me standing in my crib laughing happily. And I used to see them all of the time as a child, I was fascinated by faeries. My father had brought me the first edition of Brian Froud's the Faeries when I was a child so I knew what I was dealing with. I believed that the faeries were there to protect me and it turns out that I was right.

One day a few months after I had gotten back into contact with the faeries. I felt an indescribable desire to go out to the faerie house in the front yard to receive a message from the other, dark faeries, who I was (justifiably) wary of. I sat there, actually feeling a bit silly because I was waiting for a message from the faeries. Anyway, I was sitting there when all of a sudden I felt an intense pressure in my head, like a part of my mind was being sealed off. I had received the message. Clearly the message wasn't for me, I was just the messenger and so I thanked the faeries and went inside. Not long after that, the dreams started. I had a recurring daydream where I was being interviewed by a grey-haired man in a suit. Interestingly part way through the interview, the man would be asking for my name and where I lived and I would get up and go to a door behind him walk through into another room where there were faeries trapped in faraday cages. At seeing the trapped faeries, I would get very stressed. If there is one thing that I have learnt is that you don't want to fuck with a faerie, they fuck you right back. So I would attempt to let the faeries out and the daydream ended there. It was interesting because when the man would ask me my name, my first instinct was to avoid the question, the same as when he asked me where I lived. It seemed to me, that this man wanted information from me and that I must not give him that information.

The daydream was fairly similar each time with the man asking my name and where I lived different ways and each time I avoided the question. The building that this happened in was a red bricked government building with white details and a grey tiled roof, it was peopled with people in uniform (which I thought was American) and civilians. I instinctively knew or rather felt that this building was on a base in Marylands, USA. On one of the visits to the building I went outside into the courtyard and built a small faerie shrine where I left flowers for the faeries. What I didn't know then was that I was remote viewing or astral travelling to an actual building and that the men in suits, well they were very interested in me indeed. For some reason I took to exploring the building when I was there. There were a lot of corridors and rooms that looked scientific or maybe even medical. Once I came across a bay of windows where I saw a life-sized female faerie in a bed. I went into the room to ask her if she needed any help. She telepathically communicated to me that she was quite alright and that she wanted to know what I would like as a gift. I thought about it briefly and thought that I would like to have a baby with my boyfriend as we had been trying without success for a little while, so this is the gift that I asked her for. She smiled her assent and I left the room and I thought no more about it.

In my travels to this red-bricked building I met a man who identified himself as Major Tom Weston. Tom and I struck up a sort of a friendship, it was clear that these people wanted information from me but I was unwilling to give it to them. But Tom was nice, for an enemy. I think that there is even a word for that phenomenon, when soldiers from the opposite side become 'friends' with their enemy counterpart. Tom tried scanning my mind a number of times but there was always that part that was shut off from him. The men who interviewed me and Tom were really interested in the faeries too. Tom would ask all sorts of questions, and I told him that he was a fool indeed to trap faeries as sooner or later they would fuck you up. The faeries were interested in Tom and the men and I felt sure that they were protecting me. What I didn't know then was that I was in extreme danger, my life was at risk and that it was going to get a lot worse indeed.

End of Chapter 1.
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