100% upvote & a resteem. Excellent quality post on what is happiness. I think you're right. we're a society obsessed with happiness and I was listening recently to a talk by someone who was in the field of developmental psychology and she was saying that so many times when she asks people what do they want for their kids.. they always say "I want them to be happy" and she never heard what she thought was the right answer. I want them to be able to feel confident in their decision making abilities and stand up on their own two feet believing in themselves. because it's a road or a path towards or away from .. the idealism of happiness. Happy is as happy does. It's more often expressed by the lack of ability to reach out and touch it. what makes you happy. a very complex blend of neurotransmitters responding to an unending cacophony of ideas & influences which science barely understands. good health is a kind of happiness and so is love, purpose, belonging, community, relaxation, holidays, achievements, friendship, art, discovery, adventure, comprehension, mindblowing facts, new moves, a new skill perfected, good food, beautiful music.. all of these things can create in their own way a contribution towards a state of positive feeling..
and remember, it's also a choice. we can co-create happiness, Penny between every single one of us, we can make happiness come true :) if we remember we are an important character in a thousands plays, novels, films, not just the star in our own one.. that to me is the essence of discovering one of the meanings of life and that is tantamount to happiness
Thank you for this answer! You got the essence of my post! (not that I ever had a doubt...)
You said the magic phrase: The idealism of happiness! Indeed! It's like 'The One' for women, that non-existing perfect man... Same with the perfect life and perfect job and perfect house and so on (@tarazkp made a similar post today that we talked about already, on perfectionism).
I don't know how much is a choice...but then again, as a natural Drama Queen (and redhead haha) probably I do choose the Drama over happy moments often... (@creutzy knows what I'm talking about...and I thank him for his patience with me...)
But yes, I guess if we really want to we can create it...and what the hell, we will! :D
the funny thing is there is a perfect house and perfect job and a perfect partner; a perfect life. If I listed all those things out millions of people would chop off their left arm to swap with me, I know that.. and from a perspective of making choices and a bit of luck, yes I do have the perfect life, I am very happy and it's mostly down to the 3 amazing women I live with, the amazing parents who raised me, the amazing siblings I've got and the amazing opportunities I've had to live the life I've had. and believe me, you can never truly appreciate the notion of JOY if you've never been really SAD.. a relative concept of experience. lefties are generally extra sensitive to it !
I totally agree - you certainly have to pass through the rocky road to appreciate the calm beach after that...I don't know if the term for the beach is 'perfect' but it sure is 'matching' for you, personally.
Also, what you mention in the end, very important, and most people -including me - often forget about it: Be grateful for what you have.
When you put it this way, I am grateful for most things in my life. My family, my friends, my boyfriend... but then the routine comes and we tend to put aside things we take for granted and whine for the little stuff (at least we women do that a lot :P )
You know when my wake up call comes? In 2 cases: a. when I lose someone (literally - death - or metaphorically - breaking up/moving away) and b. when I see someone, whichever age or situation, on a wheelchair. Especially in the 2nd case, I feel like stardust, as you said. I feel so small, so worthless, so 'stop whining you idiot about your stupid life which is perfect and look at this'... But unfortunately this doesn't last long, clearly...nothing does... But here we are, trying to make the world a better place :)
even simpler than that perhaps is that every moment you've experienced (so far) is the sum total of so MUCH energy expended, pain, sacrifice the WHOLE OF THE HISTORY OF THE UNIVERSE has experienced just so we can walllow... nah, the point of my story about the history of the universe was really an attempt to point out how much has been done for us to just experience this that any thing less than your full 100% appreciation for our lives would seem rather contemptuous, no matter how difficult it might seem !!
I think very few people appreciate the sum of energy of the whole universe assigned to them, specifically. But if I haven't done it so far, I'll start doing it more now for sure ;)