Why Forbidden Things Pleasant? Teenager's Perspective and Positive Parenting

"If it's unpleasant, no one will like it. And if no one likes it, how can it be forbidden?"

Back in high school, i was fond of cutting classes by ruining the lights of our classroom, wearing an inappropriate uniform, wearing a wig to abide the hair code, and by forcefully climbing over the walls and gate like Spiderman. My purpose? Back then i don't much realize why, i just want to do it because it's prohibited.

Teenager's perspective

The worst option that many adolescents prefer is to abide prohibition as they take it a developmental process. In this stage, they'll use prohibition to differentiate the themselves from their knowledge and doctrines obtained from their parents or guardians to whom they grew with. Their desire to know what's forbidden also results in irresistible curiosity.
"The forbidden fruit is sweeter because simply it's forbidden." -Adam
We all go in a stage in our lives that we try to be independent and free and we try to have a distance to our parents or guardians to know more about ourselves and our own ideas and views.

If you're the parent, the best option for you is positive parenting and these are the things that you can do:

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Expressing Opinions

Only the person himself/herself has the right to make their own decisions and trajectory to his/her own life. But as a parent you can still manage to help them in the process by expressing opinions about the certain things they are about to do, or you think that they might likely do, and the forbidden things they already done. When we tell them that they can't do a certain thing, it's better to explain them clearly why they must not do it and why isn't the right choice.

Making an Agreement instead of Prohibition or Threatening.

Always keep in mind that if you forbid a teenager of doing something, they will find a way if they really want to do it. And also keep in mind that prohibition turns to an instant argument, and an argument leads to a fight that will create a physical and emotional distance between you and worst case of all is that imposing prohibition can cause rejection from your child. So making an agreement is better.

Do not Judge and Disrespect

You maybe so very angry to your son/daughter about the craziness they done, but think of a man in general, we aren't all perfect and we all learn from our mistakes so try to stay cool and stick to the positive discipline. If we disrespect our own children we are losing the mutually beneficial relationship with them. We show respect to them by respecting their feelings, opinions, privacy, temperament, and personal space."What you get is what you give."
However, most people inevitably learn from their mistakes.

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