I really hope you get that positive breakthrough soon. But I see things in a very different way.

From an early age we are drilled to expect rewards from suffering - this is the basis of many religions. If you eat less, you'll be healthier. If you work harder, you'll get richer. If you give, you will receive.

The answer to all of these is: not necessarily. But they're a good way of manipulating populations to work harder and complain less.

I went through a similar process to what you are describing in my career. I thought that if I worked harder than everyone else, learned more, got to work earlier, never made any mistakes etc, I would achieve more. I found out it didn't work like that - I just got taken for granted and ultimately ended up being booted out. My hard work counted for nothing. But I learned a lot.

I see life as a learning experience. You'll probably be learning things that you could never have imagined a year ago, though that will be little comfort now. When I was made redundant I became much more clever about managing my finances, about investing for the future, and about wasting less and making things last longer. My politics changed; I learned to see things differently. I'm much, much happier now than when I was earning my regular salary. It's been a struggle, but I now have investments that I would never have thought of taking on if I'd been more comfortable and complacent. I'd probably never have learned about crypto for a start!

I suspect those people in politics you mention don't really have great lives at all. I think you probably have to be highly compromised to be a successful politician. They probably have many skeletons in their closets that they are terrified will fall out and ruin everything for them.