This is something I wanted to share for a while now.. Life Lessons that I learned, serious Food For Thought with potential to change someone’s life.

So this isn’t chronological, and this piece of advice is actually the most recent one.

"You have to be childlike in the pursuit of your life, but you cannot be childish."

What does that mean…I asked myself when I first heard those words from Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat.Pray.Love and insanely inspiring human (the title is 100% quoting her). I paused the interview I was watching instantly and let it sink in. She chooses her words very explicitly. Her speeches on Ted X and Oprah were so high-quality and the interview just as amazing, where she literally freestyles targeted helpful life advice with ease. But enough raving for now and let’s get to it!

So as I  was watching her interview, this particular piece of advice struck me…

Understanding the big difference between childlike and childish:


Childlike means walking into the world with wide wonder, being open-minded, letting go of bitterness, ready to be amazed and taught, which obviously is positive.

Childish means having unrealistic expectations, thinking: „I want it and therefore I should have it. It’s not fair, nothing goes my way, nobody likes me, I didn’t go to the right school, and because I want it I should have it.“

Being childish is not only bad for you, but it is a very risky and scary mentality.

You can work as hard as you can, give something your all and at the end it doesn’t work out. Is that fair? No. Do I like that? Certainly not, but that’s how it is and I think a lot of young people are cheered on and given this mentality of „hard work pays off“ which is not a fact, and others don’t go after what could be, because they are afraid of failure. So here are my thoughts on this:

As simply and harsh as it sounds and how many times you have heard this, but LIFE IS NOT FAIR.

When people say things like „life is fair to those who work hard or do their best“ that simply isn’t true and I hate how my generation is cheered into the illusion of it. You might disagree like I used to as well, but when you begin to face reality, you start to mature, grow, understand that in life you can’t expect a certain outcome.

 Expectations are what drives people insane, is the source of fear of failure.  Yes you can increase your chances, and don’t get me wrong. I’m not being pessimistic, I’m actually the furthest away from being pessimistic. I’m a 100% optimist and I do believe that you are in charge of creating a life you love to live, that there are endless possibilities to pursue your dreams and you can succeed IF you aren't stubborn and childish on the approach. I believe in Napoleon Hill's statement "whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve", anything is possible, but at the same time you don't know what it is that will work, so you either quit because one path didn't expect the way you wanted it to, or you change the pattern, let go of one thing and allow yourself to move on.

The present moment, the process and life in general becomes a lot easier and filled with more positive energy and happiness when you accept it as a fact, that you cannot expect a certain outcome from an action that you take, as if life would owe you that. That would be childish. Sometimes life works in your favor and sometimes it doesn't. It is your grown up responsibility to be aware of that, make decisions based on that knowledge and don't quit because one approach doesn't work the way you expect it to. 

When understanding this and accepting it as a fact, you begin to realize that the moment you let go of expectations from one thing, you allow yourself to let go, pursue whatever you want to pursue, go paths you want to go, simply because you are curious. Your curiosity becomes bigger than your fear of failure, because there is no failure without expectations. NOW that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have dreams and goals to accomplish and work towards, I have very specific goals and they are expectations of the larger picture, BUT I don’t put the pressure of matching those expectations on one particular activity. To make it more clear.. 

Don’t rely on one option and be stubborn with the path. 

Sometimes it isn’t the right timing, you for example could be „too ahead“ with your product and the market isn’t ready yet. Learn to let go of it, you can keep it in the back of your head, but move forward.

Be mature, look after yourself in the real world, pursue your goals and if one path doesn’t work as you thought it would, don’t freak out and get a childish tantrum, which can lead to depression, but instead focus on the path itself instead of the outcome, focus on the learning process, enjoy every moment of it, know that one thing you can count on is that YOU WILL WIN NO MATTER THE OUTCOME! You win, you win. You loose, you learn. This is something you probably have heard or read before, but it’s worthy to repeat and remind ourselves of. Also if you don’t expect and just execute out of pure curiosity, you can’t be disappointed, only surprised.

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I certainly am not at the point where I'm not childish at times and often what I write is a reminder for myself and when I will get pissed off in the future, which I will and feel like the world hates me when something doesn't work, I will come back to what I wrote and with that knowledge I can assure to get over it, adult-up, learn from it and move on. 

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I hope you enjoyed this life lesson by Elizabeth Gilbert. As always drop a comment below,  I appreciate your thoughts!

Much love,

Mrs.Steemit