Parenting, Punk Rock, and Photography

I've been doing some thinking lately about the labels we've been given (and given to ourselves), the masks that we wear, and the roles that we play in our daily lives. Hell, I've even described myself with 6 such labels here on my own Steemit page.

We took this picture of our family on self-timer a couple years ago. We had gotten all dressed up and taken some really nice family portraits, and then decided to take one that was a little more realistic ;)

I won't delve too deeply into this subject, but it has led me to ponder a bit. I haven't opened up much on Steemit. It's been a lot of fun participating in the challenges and contests and interacting with other users. But I've mostly been a closed book when it comes to talking about myself. Although I've had intentions of doing a little writing and a little sharing, I've just always been extremely apprehensive. I'm usually a listener; not a talker. Hopefully that's about to change, thanks to Steemit. 🙂

So as I was pondering, I began thinking about one of my "labels" and about my relationship with my husband of 11 years: my best friend and my partner for life.

@jasonrussell was my first boyfriend when I was 12 years old. We were high school sweethearts, and we only split for a short time when I went off to college so I could "find myself". It wasn't long before we found our way back to one another, and here we are at ages 34 and 35 with a beautiful family.

Now that I've explained a tiny bit of our history, I would like to share a couple of the contributing factors to the longevity of our relationship. I'm pretty sure they're anything but typical, but it works for us.

Jason and I have mastered the art of bickering and bantering. We love to pick on each other and give each other crap, but in a joking manner. Our particular brand of humor may seem off-putting to some, but we crack each other up! 🙂 However, sometimes the bickering can become serious. When it starts to border on the start of what would become a fight, that's when we know it's time to stop and give each other our space.

And this space is part of what helps us maintain our healthy relationship. Don't get me wrong. We love our time together. We love to spend time with our daughters as a family. We love to hang out together with our friends.

Having fun as a family at a concert earlier this year

As photographers, we love to do photo shoots together. As music lovers, we love to go to concerts together. As nature lovers, we love to go hiking, camping and floating together. But we also enjoy doing these things apart at times, and we both understand the need for and the importance of personal space.

As adults, and especially as parents, it's difficult to find "me time". Jason and I have found a way to work that into our busy lives and allow for occasional "me time" as well as "us" time.

A couple times a month, I go out to play music with some of my best friends. It's the perfect way for me to unwind. For a couple hours, I'm not "mom", I'm not "Jason's wife" and I'm not a full time employee. I'm just in my element, letting the music flow and taking a break from the world around me.

Same goes for Jason. A couple times a month, he goes out to do photo shoots on his own. He's not "dad". He's not "Melody's husband". He's not a full-time employee. He's in his element, taking a break from the world around him. We both understand the need for this space, and the benefit as a result.

It's funny because we actually took these photos of one another, but I had to show some proof of us doing what we do! ;)

I'm sure there are many ways for this to be misinterpreted, as if we don't enjoy our roles as parents and spouses, but I mean anything but that! We have just discovered the importance of personal space and respect for one another's space. This may not work for everyone, but it works for us.

In terms of social media, I've always kept things on the surface and only shared the basic aspects of my life. So although I could elaborate much more on this subject, I'm still learning to "come out of my shell". Steemit is such a genuine, open, and welcoming place and I hope to eventually be able to share more of my thoughts on a deeper level.

Thanks for reading 🙂