Why The All-Or-Nothing, Mindset is TERRIBLE To have!
I'm guilty on this one. I have a very black and white, Or all or nothing mentality.
That means I have to go the full 100% Or 0. There is no in between.
When I have a list of To-do's I either do EVERYTHING OR NOTHING.
When I start work, I intend to finish, ALL of it!
You may be thinking, to some extent this mindset sounds good! But is it?
Consistency Is Important!
People seem to struggle with consistency these days. We give it our all for a couple of weeks; We see no results. So we give up!
This all or nothing mindset hurts our ability to be consistent.
If your goal is to write two posts a day on Steemit, If you had a busy or stressful day, Isn't one good enough? Or would you rather do 0?
You can be too committed sometimes
Yes! Commitment is a good thing, and you should be committed. But when you are too committed then it can create the imbalance. A good example is in relationships, If you are investing too much and the other person isn't investing as much, It creates the imbalance. Then you may look like a clingy person. Or if you aren't investing anything, You'll look like you don't care.
Balance is necessary. Being very black and white minded can cause problems.
Sometimes that gray area is the best way to be.
You might give up too early!
Once you get tired, Instead of putting in a bit less effort. You may quit instead.
You quitting may be too early, Right before you were about to get great results! You'll be too burned out to continue because you went in so fierce.
You Put so much Pressure On Yourself
I tend to do this. I give myself a day off. I go on dates with my boyfriend. And I get no work done. I mean it's a day off right?
But then I start thinking of how helpful it would be If I got a few things done for the day...
I then get home, and it's only a couple hours before bedtime, And I'm scrambling like a crazy person to get not, SOME work done. But ALL of my daily goals done.
Even though I wrote 3 Posts for the day, And uploaded 20 shirts. I'm UPSET! Because I didn't get the last post done. I wanted to finish it!
So this pressure, Not only causes me to be incredibly stressed. But it causes me to discount the work I did. I did A LOT in a couple of hours. I was productive, And I should be proud. But because of my all or nothing mindset. I write off all that I did Because I didn't finish that one last little thing...
This is harmful to your self-esteem and future progress.
Because I "failed" that day. Do you think next time I go on a date, I'll want even to TRY to get stuff done? Probably not. Instead, I'll opt for NOTHING. Even though What I did, Is still BETTER than nothing.
See how messed up this logic can be?
Did You know...
That when you are under pressure, Your brain is more likely to resort back to your regular habits? It's because your habits ARE EASY. Easy on your mind, Easier on your physical body. And you are already stressed... So why not?
If you are constantly putting yourself under pressure because of you all or nothing mindset. You are setting yourself up for failure if you are trying to make massive changes to your habits.
Conclusion
While the all or nothing mindset can give you lazer focus for a while, and make you feel like your on top of the world, It also has a very bad side. Consistency is important. And a black and white mindset can't always keep up with that type of consistency.
I always love your posts. They are so nicely presented. I just love it :)
Thank you so much hehe.
This reminds me of the Book I read last year Mini habits. It talks about how you start small habits such as running one lap per day around the track then next week two laps compounding your strength and results.
We will be able to look back and see how something simple like the single rain drop consistently dripping carved the grand canyon.
I LOVE THAT!
Mini habits are really effective! Hehe.
Power comes from cosistent patterns daily. That will set you apart from the pack. Your mind must run 1000 MPH day and night from the womb to the tomb to come up with all of these ideas for posts its mental workout ;)
LOL I suffer from this, too and I can tell you it is a struggle. I find I have to break my chores, work etc. down into smaller increments or I get nothing done.
For instance, if my goal is to 'clean the house'...I get a minimal amount accomplished. If my goals are broken down I can do dishes, check. Sweep and mop floor, check. Dust furniture, check. Meh...maybe I'm just foolin' myself LOL.
Love your writing!
From some time I think that the most important thing in being sucessfull (in any kind of activity) is being perseverance. If you will be doing things stick to the plan, some day you will achive your goal. Easier said than done :-)
This is why people share, during normal friend to friend conversation, that it's hard to balance work and relationships. It's truly hard. But at times when things seem to go right, we say that we can do both, but by then I don't know if it's an illusion of the present or not.
I'm with you on the consistency and being under pressure. The best advice for this is as you say to not be in a hurry always 'cos we'll be really frustrated and go back to our own habits. You're right. It's so easy to go back.
Exactly! I love how you mentioned it could be an illusion. I'm thinking your right on that! the more I try to "balance" my life out, The more imbalanced it feels. There just isn't enough time in the day to accomplish everything you'd like.
This is so true, miss kaylinart. On point.
It's a proof of complexity of the human mind. It's in fact everything that we can use it to describe from Awesome to Zealous.
Staying commited and not giving up is probably one of the most important things in life.
Exactly :) It's so true.
Surely a bunch of 90% efforts is better than nothing at all? Who wants perfection anyway?... Ok don't answer that!
Exactly! Perfection is something that is unachieveable!
Agree, passion in moderation is the key.
One can argue though that exceptional things are achieved from the 'All or Nothing' mentality, as those who are living proof of this more likely would not start something that they are not able to complete, simply because it wouldn't feel right to have something pending. Still, might be at the cost of one or all of these- emotional, mental and physical health.
I am very all or nothing as well, I can either get everything on my to do list done in 6 hours or waste an entire day in my bed and on social media. I really need to learn to always be productive without doing too much and burning myself out.
Oh gosh you sound so much like me with that! We have to practice appreciating a little bit of effort each day, Even if we don't knock out everything on our lists.
Yes, definitely! Checking a few things off the to do list is much better than none at all. And doing them all in one day can just put me in such a bad mood because I get exhausted from it all.
SO true! Heheh! I feel the same way. I get so exhausted and want to take a full day off, But if I do a little each day I won't be so overwhelmed.
all or nothing mind really both give me pain sometimes, but now I treat it as a strrength ? think it in a positive way, we do everything with 100% effort, why not? tho it may hurt sometimes, that's life.
Exactly!