The End of Struggle - Learning How to Want Purely

As many of you already know, I'm in the process of moving into semi-retirement at a less expensive location.

As part of this transition, I've been needing to make a lot of decisions. There are obvious ones like what moving company to use, travel dates, turning off the utilities, etc. but also some that for most people would be considered "once in a lifetime."

In that last bucket I'd put deciding what to want.

Now of course, we want this and then that, over and over. Deciding what we want is a repetitive need, not once in a lifetime. But the decision upon me now is the decision about what type of thing to want.

Previously, though I didn't realize it, I ultimately always wanted a solution to a problem or safety from an unseen threat.

I grew up poor, so I always had this sense that things were on the verge of falling apart. Food wouldn't always be there. The rent wouldn't always be paid. Sometimes the utilities would be turned off. This was my entire childhood, so it programmed me for being alert to impending hardship and loss. All my wants ultimately boiled down to security.

So to come to this point in life where I honestly can't even imagine any external threat to my well-being, and where I've developed myself enough internally that I also don't worry about self-sabotage or insatiable greed undermining me, well it's a new experience. I am having to learn how to want in a different way.

I've been sitting with this a lot lately. Do I want to move to Santa Fe or back to Hawaii or to the Southeast where I have family? Do I want to invest in this or that and how much in each? Do I want to buy another house now or wait a few years? Do I want to move overseas or stay here in the US?

These are all the same decisions I would need to make coming from a sense of lack and warding off threat vs a sense of abundance and simply clarifying greater fulfillment. The answers change a lot though. What I actually request of Spirit changes radically with the perspective from which the question arises.

For example, if you thought you might run out of money at some point, you would probably want to invest in ways that create additional residual income, such as buying investment property. But if you felt confident additional large sums of money were headed your way if ever you needed them, you might instead hold the money in a more liquid form, so that you could quickly take advantage of any such opportunities when they presented themselves.

I caught myself flipping between exactly these choices as I thought about investments. I realized that despite my newfound freedom within abundance, I was still thinking about life from a "keep the rent paid" mentality.

Well, I'll probably wind up writing more about this some other time. I have the feeling this is going to be a process with many layers. Just wanted to point out this first layer I've spotted and invite you to take a look at the presumptions behind how you choose what to want too.

Are you coming from a place of abundance and faith or are you coming from a sense of needing to make it work yourself or risk loss? Is your life a struggle for survival or a dance that moves from one delight to the next?

Do you see that there is an equal option for it to be either? Even if it has been only one or the other up to this point, just realize that there is more than one way to experience life, no matter what situation your parents were in.

(Photo source: Pixabay)

Other articles of mine you may enjoy:

• Find Your Tree
• A Simple Observation
• My Bucket List - challenge accepted

Resteems always appreciated!