RE: Tonight I Gave the Love of My Life Permission To Die
I don't have words, which as you know, is not a common thing for me, but I've got to put something here.
When I first saw your post, I seriously considered skipping it. I knew from the title where it was going to take me and I didn't want to go there.
But now I've read your post, and I'm exactly where I knew I would be—in tears, wishing there was something in my power that could just make this all go away—the cancer, the seizures, the hanging on, the need for both of you to let go—all of it.
But I don't even have the words, so how I can manage any of the rest?
The only thing I think I can offer is a strong belief that is steadily growing—and your account of Brian's inbetween time helps to strengthen this belief—that this life is not all there is, but that life continues beyond this all too short and imperfect purview we call mortality.
I believe in purpose. We don't just poof into existence, and we don't just poof out. I believe that in one way or another, this life is just a speed bump between an infinite existence before we arrived here, and one that stretches into eternity on the other side.
I believe we can reunite with loved ones after this life. I believe the loves and friendships that we develop here can and do exist beyond this life.
It sounds like you believe the same, and if you do, this is just all one soul's affirmation to another.
I don't have the words. I can only hope what I'm feeling and what I hope for both you and Brian can somehow be conveyed in the novel length comment I've left here. :)
Oh I think you found the perfect words my friend. Your comment has left me in tears as well, so perhaps in some strangely sad way, we are even now. Your soul conveyed exactly what I needed to hear, the dire hope that we "reunite with our loved ones" after this purposeful journey. I used to believe that all things happen for a reason, but after these last few years, I'm beginning to think that sometimes shit happens but how we deal with that storm is really what's important. Brian and I are doing our best to do just that, and of course, live every day in gratitude. This morning the sun seemed to shine brighter, the breeze fresher, my coffee tastier, all because he woke up too. It's all I ask for anymore.
I agree with you. There are still some things that happen for a reason, and there are other things that happen because it's life. Either way, as you say, I too believe it's what we do with either of those situations that actually matters. The whole lemons into lemonade cliche.
It's amazing how simple life can be when it's boiled down to its essential essence. "He woke up, too."
Standing in my shoes, you do quickly realize what's important in life and what is utter nonsense. My sense is that generally speaking, people focus too much on the nonsense, until it's way too late. I'm thrilled however, that Brian and I have lived our time together, focusing on what's really important to us. No regrets...
Beautifully written @glenalbrethsen. I had a lot of the same thoughts you did. You expressed it nicely.
Glen is really very eloquent and I know it's all in your heart as well @beeyou :)
You know I am just too tired and lazy to write these days Lynn, but my heart is there with you both. Glenn said it perfectly, no need to repeat. :)
I know that @beeyou; I completely understand and know what you mean.
I think everyone who commented here did. I know in my case I'm hoping it's the thought that counts.
It certainly is the "thought that counts" in my eyes. Period.
Those were very kind and heartfelt words @glenalbrethsen. Thank you for them.
I thought so too @mistermercury and am very appreciative of @glenalbrethsen and his words.
I appreciate that, and you're welcome. If they actually do something, I don't think they're my words alone, so feel free to share in them if you like. The more the merrier. :)