Perspective Matters

evernoticethat (64)in #life • 4 years ago

At times, what we choose to see comes from the twisted reality within our own minds...

Sitting here, I'm reminded of a situation where the point of view a person has can color everything. We were on the job, and a male co-worker accidentally brushed against a female employee while carrying some boxes. He apologized and she said it was ok.

End of story, right?

Nope.

I was walking a little bit ahead of them on the right, and could see the guy looking at her. To me and everyone else, it was a non-issue, but the guy wouldn't let it go. "I said I'm sorry" he implored, but she was already past it, and was like: "It's no biggie." But for some reason, no matter what she said, he couldn't accept that that was it. He accused her of being a "Bitch" and then they both began raising their voices.

When he caught up with us, I asked why he was making something out of nothing. From our perspective, it was a completely accidental brush against her arm with a box, but he didn't see it that way. To him, it was HER that was making it into something, but it was all in his head...

Only now, he'd called her the "B" word.

So we get back to the office and he tells management what happened, instead of just letting it go. They contact the supervisor (who'd been told nothing about it by the girl) and she confirms it was no problem, but he did cal her the name.

You see how this is escalating?

Next thing you know, he's spinning a tale where he imagines she 's thinking he harassed her when nothing of the sort occurred. Management hears the "B" word and harassment and decide to suspend him pending termination.

All of this over the demons in his mind causing him to imagine something in her mind that wasn't...

Since I was known for being honest, they asked me for the truth and I told them. Because of me, he wasn't fired, but I never worked with him again. Turns out, he's a heavy drinker and has a habit of setting fires in his mind like this. He'd put a few away that day and the effects of the alcohol and whatever else he was doing, made him both bold and paranoid. I suggested he seek help.

Sometimes we only see what we want to see. This was a crystal-clear example of where one person almost wrecked his future, by seeing something that wasn't there at all. Perspective Matters...