Em's Musing #4: What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger

Hardships in life are all but natural. What is unnatural is to give up on them because they are part of a deal in life. When things go rough, I always believe in the phrase: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.

I have experience so many hardships in life where I thought I could never pass from. It’s like you’re drowning but you alone can save you because no one dares to. I have to toughen up and do everything in my power to take myself out of the water and on a safe ground. And yes, I did it.

Like how Kelly Clarkson put it on her song with the same title:

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone

Back when I was in College, I experienced being a loner because all of my so-called friends left me. It was a turning point in my life where I saw who will stick with me through thick and thin (sadly, no one did). So, what I did was instead of pitying myself I did not mind the scenario at all. I made it as a learning opportunity for myself to grow. I know I was a beautiful mess back then and I was a black sheep of my family but after what happened, I felt like I came out stronger and braver. I acknowledge what happened to me but turned it into a positive thing. Gradually, I made new friends. The ones who really stick with me until now.

From my hardships, I learned to fight back and never let anyone step on me. I was a suck up before. You know, your classmate who is pushed by anyone and never bothered to speak up even though the situation hurts her so much? Yeah, I was that girl who is like a maid to everyone and always aims to please anyone she meets. Mind you, if you think you are also like this then please stop yourself. You cannot please anyone and all of these people can turn against you in a heartbeat. I know this sounds rude but it is true. Stop yourself and reflect.

So what to do? Let me put it bluntly.

Be you. Love yourself first and if you think someone’s not good for you, then it probably is.

Don’t be like me who spent my childhood and teenage years in the shadows and always pushed by other people in the corner. When I decided that I’m done, it felt like there’s a light at the end of a dark tunnel and I came out of it. I come out stronger and changed for the better. I like myself now than before. I have drowned but I push myself out of the water and onto the safe ground.

Always think about if the action you’ll do can please others but can harm you. This is not selfishness but simply guarding yourself from harm. Of course, for your family and loved ones you can make a sacrifice for them but not for bad people. Choose who you’ll take the bait for. If it doesn’t kill you then you’ll come out stronger.

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June 15, 2018 - 7:10 PM

Read my past Musings below:

Em's Musing #1: You Have Your Own Time, Life Is Not A Race

Em's Musing #2: Be in A Relationship or Stay Single

Em's Musing #3: Do Something That Your Future Self Will Thank You For