Wow, thank you for sharing that. You did mention before how close you were with your Grandma. That is amazing that you at least got to see her and say good bye and you left on a good note. I am sure you helped her through some of her darkest times too. I think she knew who really loved her and made an effort and who didn't. People unfortunately even family members can be very selfish, greedy and petty over really dumb things. When my dad died, all us brothers promised to never let anything like that get in the way of us.

As far as your brother is concerned, I have been in similar situations. I had an older brother that had issues with that as well. He has passed on now. I will be writing about that in the future at some point but wanted to get my dad done first.

Yeah my brothers friends and other people my mom used to let live in the house used to steal money out of my wallet and pawn my video games for drug money. They need to be battling their demons, otherwise it will be the end of them. I hope your brother can wake up one day and be done with it like mine did. But he had a very hard time and was in and out of jail, homeless for long periods of time, etc.

Deep down he had self worth issues and didn't think he was worthy of being happy or successful and thought of himself as a fuck up and that further fueled his escapism. I don't know if your brother is going through the same thing or not, but I hope you can give him the same unconditional love that you gave your Grandma, despite his mistakes and short shortsightedness.

Good for you facing your demons too. I have been reading about how you have been getting clean from anti-depressants I hope that is still going well and know that you have my support!