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RE: Your inner voice and what it does to you.
What I believe you have discovered is self-compassion. Most of learn about compassion as children as we are raised by our caregivers.
Self-compassion comes when we learn how to be alone and notice our own pain. Once we notice our own pain, it is easier to become aware of the pain others are going through.
I have found it difficult to do it the other way around. I had to be trained by others to have compassion for self, too.
Congratulations on breaking through some of the taboos against knowing who you are.
Thank you @digitalfirehose, its amazing to see what you have added. self-compassion is one of the best thing that a person can do for self.