On "Being Boring," Group Think and Other Life Experiences

I don't exactly remember the first time someone called me "boring."

However, I am pretty sure it involved some situation where one of my childhood friends wanted to undertake a harebrained adventure doomed to failure, or a painful ending, or parental punishment... or all of the above. I'm pretty sure I was about seven or eight, at the time.

As a teenager, I was "boring" because I thought the idea of skipping school and ending up in detention was stupid, and I thought cigarettes-- and going off to smoke them under the bleachers-- were stupid.

In college, I was thoroughly boring because I wanted to do other things with my weekends than drinking myself senseless and waking up next to "some girl" whose name I didn't feel entirely certain about. Some thought I was thoroughly boring because I had no interest in getting stoned or using large volumes of nose candy to "alter" my state of being.

Our Strangely Dichotomous Values

As I reflect on my life-- from age almost-57-- I recognize that the typical reason I would get labeled as "boring" was pretty directly tied to the fact that I seemed able to recognize "stupid acts" as stupid, before engaging in them... and then choosing not to do them.

I have almost always been able to evaluate the consequences of actions with rather alarming accuracy, before getting involved in things. And frankly? The cost-benefit ratio seldom looks pretty, from where I am sitting. 

What got me to reflecting on "being boring" (which I am actually quite content being...) was the realization of just how contradictory our value systems tend to be. 

Think about it: We place a very high value on "the individual," and on "independent thinking," and on "creating your own reality." We tend to admire those who march to the beat of their own drummer. 

And yet, we also tend to negatively label those who tend to not follow the "group think" paradigm; those who don't succumb to peer pressure... for example, we call them "boring," or "weird." 

These dualities seem to be present in so much of the human experience... we almost idolize things we also loathe and despise.

We're a weird and baffling species, sometimes.

Meanwhile, it appears I have inadvertently created a "purple post" without even realizing it... technically speaking, your could be part of the #sundaypurple photography challenge, which is part of #colorchallenge. But that's just a complete side thought. Funny, how life manifests, sometimes!

How about YOU? Did you ever find yourself being characterized as "boring" or some other mildly derogatory term-- not just as a momentary slight, but as something that followed you through a large part of your life? Do you recognize odd paradoxes or dualities, in parts of your own life, in terms of how people respond yo you? Where were these dualities? Are they still there? Leave a comment-- share your experiences-- start the conversation!

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Posted 20170624 23:11 PDT