My DEMON Speaks
You are not good enough
You are not as smart as everyone else in this room. Your ideas are silly. Look how smart they look. You will look like a fool. Just sit there. The topic will flow better without your input. Let everyone else speak. Why do you want to dominate the conversation? They are so much better than you. ...
These are the gentle whispers of my demon.
I've been struggling to overcome that voice for most of my life. The good thing is that the more I learn to lean on Jesus the more I recognize that those ideas aren't my own. They truly are lies being told to me. The Holy Spirit has a voice too and can totally drown out the lies. My prayer is that now as I have become very aware of voice and the lie I can learn to turn to the voice of truth.
Public speaking terrifies me
Contributing to a group is difficult for me. Part of the fear is that I have, over time, trusted to believe the lies whispered to me when presented with opportunities to speak.
The camera is a tool for recognition and healing
As a YouTuber I've struggled with how I appear on camera. What is the image projected to my audience. Oh my gosh, I have an audience! What do they think? My production sucks, my story is stupid... Why am I even doing this YouTube thing?
I believe now that God has used the creation of videos and the telling of my story to reveal to me that I can trust in Him. Sometime around August 2016 I had a "turning point", a revelation, a realization. That is that I do not have to hold onto pride and perfection. I do not have to listen to the lies anymore. It's still a struggle, but I'm aware now. Perfection never was achieved, but there was this idea that if I didn't push for it I was a failure. The quest for perfection only made me frustrated and angry. My family suffered for this. Praise God that now, I can let that go and learn more and more every day to lean on Jesus. I can learn to reflect his image rather than somehow creating a perfect "me" on my own.
Thank you for sharing this time with me!
UPVOTE, RESTEEM, and FOLLOW!
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Do you love Waffles? Try this AMAZING Recipe found here on Steemit!
This is incredible, so heartfelt and honest. I hope others will watch it and learn from your struggles and the wisdom you've gained from 'letting go'.
Thank you! Yes, 'letting go' is a serious challenge, but you just don't know what life has to offer until you do.
Blake, can I be any more of your biggest fan. Thank you for leading the way in sharing your faith as a youtube homesteader. We believing YouTubers are afraid to take that step and to share.
That's stupid, it isn't that you or I are "YouTubers". As a BELIEVER it is always a struggle to share your faith. Thank you my friend.
PS...can't wait to get some of those waffles someday!!! haha. :)
You just gotta find time in your schedule to get over here to get your waffles :) Thanks for the encouragement buddy!
You're the real deal - this is the kind of sharing that makes a difference in peoples lives. Thank you.
I do hope it means something to someone. :)
Very interesting on recording yourself and noticing how u react and treat people. It's interesting as it's a technique that teachers and coaches use to learn from. This totally makes sense.
Btw your video story telling is great! I love it! Cheers :)
Amazing post friend, I have definitely learnt a lot from this :)
Well said my friend and the devil whispers to everyone to undermine all they are capable of achieving and you are still on the journey with lots to share! Lean not on man but on God... Resteemit,upvote!
Thank you @weetreebonsai . You are a great friend and supporter :)
Thank you so much for being so open and sharing your story. Truly inspirational!
I truly appreciate that @artwithflo ! Your creative posts are inspirational as well. Thank you for sharing your gifts and passions!
Thanks for sharing that
Great stuff. Thanks for posting. I wish you well.