My Plans In Life Is Harder To Achieve Without Family Support

I Basically Am Supporting Myself Solely

Without my money that I had earned before I most possibly wouldn't survived this day as a dialysis patient alone even. During my first years as a dialysis patient my brother (not the eldest) was the one is majorly supporting me until he got married. My allowance got cut back after he had hired a nanny, basically my allowance and my mother's allowance got cut back to pay for my brother's sons nanny.

Then it got cut back some more for some reasons until I was left with less than 30% of what once was good enough for a dialysis session and 5 hospital bills payment. Now what all I got is just good for 3 hospital bills payment or $19 dollars equivalent from the $69.30 dollars that I was once getting.

Well I am not entitled to my brothers support, my parents even have no obligation for me. They are just very supportive and loving parents but they have a limitation. Financially I cannot rely on them so I am just very thankful to God that at least I am able to pay for my bills for now as well as for my medicines which is quite an achievement for a person in my condition and situation.

What I do not like about especially from my parents is that they sometimes bar what I wanted to do and sometimes would question if some of the things that I wanted to happen is needed or not. My father alone didn't do anything to have me get the chance for a Kidney transplant, he is a person that just gives up before even trying, a weak-willed and spiritless. I just do not like that trait of my father but that is him and too bad for me in that regard. Which is why I envy my neighbor who had a transplant and their parents made a way for him to get a new kidney.

Now I just have to keep on trying and be more strong in spirit and will-power and keep determined to achieve my plans in my life before things would go as bad as hell. I am actually in hell now because of the pain and discomfort that I am suffering from, the difference was only that there are no flames involved during my stay here. It is my effort to just wash way the pains and I would be happy on that alone already.

I just wished that I have a more tight-knit family with regards to my relatives because I see that all man is for himself or for his family with my relatives which is why it makes me want to stay out from their lives so I can spare them the fear of asking them for help or assistance which I will never do or never did.

Even my brethren in the church is not helping either. They did offered a free dialysis but later dismantled it because of course it is just a liability as no money goes in but all out. But that is just an opinion on that matter and again even my church have no obligation to help. So I just hope that God himself would work on my life no matter how very insignificant, uninteresting, and waste of oxygen my existence is in this world, all I wish for is to live a near normal life free of pain and misery.

But steem community is now my family that God has given me. Maybe God knows that I lack relatives, friends, and even family members that really supports me so he had introduced my into a greater number of family that is empowered to do great things faster than the speed of light for an individual like me and that I think is a blessing to me that I would be thankful a million times over.