As I left the house to come to work this morning, I had that thought of “ooh, it’s a bit cold, it’s going to be time to get the winter coat out soon” for the first time of the year. It seems that winter is well and truly on her way, and I know from experience that that also probably means that I’ll be having another regular visitor over the next few months
Ever since first meeting her, I have been prone to worst bouts of depression during the Autumn and the Winter, and I know that this year is unlikely to be any different.
Cold nights, cold heart?
Now, it isn’t that I don’t like Autumn and Winter, let me make that quite clear. I would actually say that Autumn is my favourite season of the year and Winter is my second favourite, so it would seem that Depression coming a-calling more during these months makes no sense at all.
That’s the worst thing about Depression
None of it makes any sense.
If it made sense, we would understand the illness better.
To this day, I don’t know what it is that makes Autumn and Winter the worst seasons for me for Depression, but I should imagine it is a combination of the other things that come hand in hand with those months
the regular coughs and colds
the short evenings and dark mornings making you wonder what’s the point of it all
the knowledge that Christmas (and all the inevitable expense and arguments that comes with that) is on its way
knowing that another year is coming to a close and wondering if we achieved what we needed
possible financial issues from not being to work due to bad weather
the fact that I tend to eat more in the cold months and out on a few extra pounds as a result....
All of these things don’t help me, I know that.
I also know that I am not special
So I reckon there must be thousands upon thousands of other people who are about to go through the same thing as me.
I just wanted to reassure everyone suffering with Depression that we are not alone.
Be kind to yourself when you’re having a bad day, no one can keep a happy face on all the time.