A Tale Of An Introvert
Happy weekend, Steemit family! Sometimes, I wonder what do other people think of me. Sometimes. I am typically shy especially around new people, I have a high social anxiety and yes, I am an introverted kind. I finally realized this after three (3) decades of existence lol. Other people often wrongly assume that I don't like people that much. Oh well, I can be interested in others and many other things just like in our work life.
Being an introvert, I pretty much enjoy reflecting on my own thoughts and really enjoy the company of being alone. As Marilyn Monroe says, "I restore myself being alone." And so do I. Some people would likely say, "she is boring", she is rude" and things like those. That doesn't mean I am an anti-social person. I only hope I could make others understand that each individual’s idea of fun is somewhat different. Socializing to me is a long-term goal. Something that I carefully balance so I don’t get emotional and even mentally overwhelmed.
On social media though, it's quite different because I don't have to deal with people in person lol. However, I do not entertain chit chats. I can say "hello" to you but I don't have an energy chatting all day. If I don't respond immediately, that doesn't mean, I am selfish. I do care about people, and I do appreciate them. My words won't tell you all those, but my actions will. To me, you cannot underestimate the immense joy which a cup of hot coffee watching Tv, watching the sunset, writing, taking photos or by just playing with my daughter can give.
I do not argue with people who are upset or who seem angry. I can never win lol. I am not going to respond to your angry thoughts and sentiments. It may seem rude and ignorant kinda, but I won't justify my care for you. Go figure. I just stay quiet and if you think, I am ignoring you, you are wrong. I am very sensitive to potentially negative evaluations and I am afraid of rejection nor being humiliated.
I do not initiate small talks especially around strangers, not unless you are a close friend. It is my natural tendency to always find every interaction I made to be about establishing a deep connection. Casual conversation is kind of stressful for me. On the other hand, I am always looking for new friends with whom I can share my interests and passions. Meeting those "friends" can be worth socializing. I know I’m not the only one of my kind in the world, so I bet I am worth socializing for lol. If I give my attention to you, it means you are special. I'm an introvert, and I go through socializing to look for people like me. It's worth it in the end. If you're out there, let me know. One love.~bloghound~
September 30, 2017
(Photos: Me, my daughter and I)
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Thank you very much :)
tip!
You are an amazing person, and I would never have considered you rude just because you are an introvert. I, too, am an introvert and struggle being social. I am happy being alone much of the time once in awhile. I like to go out and be in the public, but soon as I get there I often wish that I had stayed home.
Being yourself, you are very beautiful both inside and out and I am fortunate to have met you on the web.
I know you are very special, Janelle. We rarely talk but I consider you one of my inspirations online. You are very sweet and kind at heart and from the bottom of my heart, I do appreciate you a lot. Thank you so much! Xoxo
Thank you, I consider you very sweet and kind as well and lucky to be considered an inspiration to you. I enjoy reading everything that you post. Keep sharing your heart and I will keep reading.
I have to throw in a hearty "ditto" to what you said, I share similar thoughts.
Often I feel bad that small talk is a little bit of mental torture to me, but I just loathe that feeling of going through the motions & "uh huh, uh huh" conversations with people that are generally offended if I don't perform according to the script they'd hoped to evoke by daring to reply, offering a "me too" or having a perspective they don't want to consider. Then I just feel like an object to talk at because they need to waste time or want attention & not a person to talk to, if that makes sense. Plus, I just often can't deal with the emotional fallout of the criticism of not "acting right."
I just accept I don't people well & keep to myself mostly. On the plus side, I truly love being an introvert & enjoying my own quiet, contemplative, simple life & those moments of meaty deep conversations are so worthwhile. :)
@largeyuseless HI! Please to meet you!!! :)
Wow, you just sounded like me :D I think I could not think of anything else to say hehe...It's a blessing to have finally found another one like me. I have always felt like being an introvert was something I had to fix and I have been criticized for it most of my life.
Sending you lotsa love from a far. Cheers!
Thank you so much, right back at ya!
Agreed, a lot of my introvert traits were ones I struggled against that made me feel broken. I'm so thankful we're both on the path to accepting ourselves. A lot of traits I get criticised for are ones I really enjoy!
About a month back I got in a fight with someone & realized I was crying because my being thoughtful, kind & caring triggered them & they were shaming me for aspects of myself I adore & am thankful to have cultivated in myself.
Pleasure to meet you too! :)
One love. Xoxoxoxo
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Thank you so much :)
@tipU - send tips by writing tip! in the comment, get share of the profit :)sa mga katangian mong iyan kaya napalagay ng husto loob ko sa iyo ading..love yah <3 ..iyong unang picture mo meron din ako sa upuang iyong hehe
I remember manang, you took this one :D hehe
Thank you so much!
as always beautiful thoughts and beautiful photos.
Lovely photos. I could relate. :)
Thank you so much, @zararina :)
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Thank you :)