Thowing My Inner Child a Party

in #life3 years ago (edited)

The year 2017 has been big for me, healing-wise. My teacher and mentor, Michael Sheridan, has helped a lot with my "Cutting the Ties that Bind" process which I had been doing incorrectly on my own. Having his guidance and insight was so valuable for helping me identify my limiting beliefs and eliminate them.

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My issues are complex and my dreams say that, like most of us probably, I will have to heal them in layers. For example, I did a lot of work on issues I'd picked up from my mother this summer but I couldn't feel the benefits of that work on my heart until I'd also addressed the issues with my father. I healed my heart (and ability to feel my feelings) but my male energy was oppressing the healing I'd done on my female energy (lacking confidence to express those feeling). Once I healed some dad-issues, my heart was able to open wider and it so it goes, on and on.

When I started this work I expected to do the cutting the ties process once for each parent and then be deliriously happy ever after with a sudden upsurge in clairvoyance that would make it literally possible for me to see dead people. I spent a year working on myself and while my channeling is getting better, neither of these desires ever came to fruition.

Am I happy? Yes!

Is it ALL the time?

No.

I still have a few layers..

Having expectations and seeing them not met with reality was somewhat of a downer. One day, talking to a very skilled medium/channel friend, (my mentors daughter Heidi Brooke) she said I needed a ceremony. My inner child had felt so unloved and unimportant and here I'd done all of this work but I hadn't celebrated any of it. In fact, I was disappointed. She said I needed a ceremony to really seal the deal.

And she was right.

So I thought about it for a few days and came to the conclusion that what my inner child really wanted for a ceremony was a party in her honor. Yes! A party for no reason other than to celebrate our being reunited. We would invite our friends.

  • I don't even have birthday parties so this was a big deal.

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I decided to wait until after Christmas so it wouldn't feel like a Christmas party but also not on New Years Eve so it wouldn't feel like a New Years Eve party. It had to be my party, and I wanted it before the years end so I could be ready for 2018 and all the wonderful things that will be happening next.

In considering who to invite I decided to stick with closer friends who I knew would not only not-judge me but who would celebrate with me and consider this inspirational. I decided not to invite family because a few of them would talk about me and judge me behind my back and I didn't want any of that energy touching this special day. Old me would feel guilty and responsible for their feelings. My resurrected self has healed those feelings and false beliefs.

So I planned something stress free to cook and made gluten free cupcakes (for myself) and bought fancy donuts for anyone who preferred them. I even went to Party City and bought decorations that made me feel happy. Old me would see this as an unnecessary expense, new me kept reminding myself that this is how people celebrate!

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It was a very intimate gathering but that made it nice. My friend Tonya brought me a gift.

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Now I get to think of how far I've come and how worthy I am of celebration anytime I see it. In the card she wrote "the bracelet was made by a woman in Guatemala - her hands worked each bead in hopes of lifting herself and the women in her community out of poverty. My hope is whenever you see it - you think FIERCE. That's how you love!"

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I'm in the back with the wine glass and fabulous little bracelet. 😊

I really appreciated seeing my own children having fun at this party. My oldest, not pictured, was having a big-kids electronics-a-thon on the couch.

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Everyone brainstormed and decided singing "happy healing to you" would be most appropriate for the occasion.

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In all it was a wonderful evening with touching moments throughout. I feel like it was an appropriate ceremony and lesson in how to really honor oneself and ones own accomplishments. Don't just brush everything under the rug. Celebrate as many of the victories in life that you can, our lives are so much more beautiful than we take time to acknowledge.

Next, I'm thinking I can finally justify a fantastic reason for a tattoo. 😊

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Congratulations! As I somehow figured out pretty early in life, the only way you can truly experience love in your life is to learn to love yourself first. That is what your celebration is really all about. A reminder to yourself that you are in fact worth being loved and you are aware of it. Far from being selfish or egotistical, this is actually a genuine complement to those around you. Not only are you coming into your own as a person and a spiritual being in touch with her own feelings, you are very much touching and inspiring those around you with your open and honest search for who you are. And the people you choose to include in this process are an integral part of your success. Their input and support is what makes the celebration real. Anyway, I'm babbling....

I continue to be fascinated and inspired by your journey and I very much enjoy your chronicling of the process. Happy New Year! Thank you very much for sharing.

PS. Still no dreams to report..... :-)

You didn't babble at all! I loved your comment. You really get it!

And lucky YOU for figuring out early in life how integral loving yourself is. Of course I knew in theory that this was important but I was blind to all of the ways I was actually being unloving toward myself. Many times this comes in the form of being concerned with other peoples feelings to the extent that I squash my own wants, desires and preferences.

Thank you for the support and encouragement, it is truly appreciated.

This child is very beautiful, his life will be happy

Thank you!

You have really nice baby , and i hope for him happy life

Thank you very much! 😊

happy to enjoy and happy new year

Thank you! :)

This is so cool! Treat yoself! haha, glad to see you working through things still and taking time to celebrate :) Happy new years

PS what's your tattoo idea?

Thanks! My dreams are already showing me the next batch of work to be done. It gets faster each time I go back to work on a new issue but geez louise it's a marathon. :)

For my tattoo idea, I want something that is reminiscent of the joys of summer. Vibrant and bursting with life (since life is meant to be enjoyed). I'd like roots and berries to represent healing my root chakra and reproductive issues. I'd like a caterpillar, to honor the stages we go through as we strive for our highest, best selves. A butterfly because it was brave enough to have trusted the process of such a huge transformation. Flowers for love. :)

Ya, sometimes I feel like I'm doing worse for a while only to spring back better than ever, its weird and cyclical like that for me :)

Sounds like a sweet tattoo, hope it turns out great for you, my favorite tattoos are the ones with meaning. I have an idea for one of a ponderosa pine with all four seasons on part of the tree showing the cycle of seasons and the cycle of life

I'm glad you can relate to the cycles. 😊

I like the sound of your tattoo too! 😊

What a fun and creative way to appreciate and love that younger facet of yourself! Your beautiful, festive decor just made my heart feel good! And celebrations can make a deep impression on your subconscious, as well.

Happy New Year and Happy New You!

I agree! That was my intention "celebrations can make a deep impression on your subconscious"! Thank you! I still have the decor up because I enjoy it so much. :)

Amazing pictures of decoration, i hope you really enjoyed your healing party, and also good luck for your tattoo session. Thanks for sharing this post with us.

Have a great day and stay blessed.

Thank you! :) It was a very nice evening. The tattoo will have to wait a little while but I'll post about it when and if it happens. :)

Welcome. ☺👍