The year 2017 has been big for me, healing-wise. My teacher and mentor, Michael Sheridan, has helped a lot with my "Cutting the Ties that Bind" process which I had been doing incorrectly on my own. Having his guidance and insight was so valuable for helping me identify my limiting beliefs and eliminate them.
My issues are complex and my dreams say that, like most of us probably, I will have to heal them in layers. For example, I did a lot of work on issues I'd picked up from my mother this summer but I couldn't feel the benefits of that work on my heart until I'd also addressed the issues with my father. I healed my heart (and ability to feel my feelings) but my male energy was oppressing the healing I'd done on my female energy (lacking confidence to express those feeling). Once I healed some dad-issues, my heart was able to open wider and it so it goes, on and on.
When I started this work I expected to do the cutting the ties process once for each parent and then be deliriously happy ever after with a sudden upsurge in clairvoyance that would make it literally possible for me to see dead people. I spent a year working on myself and while my channeling is getting better, neither of these desires ever came to fruition.
Am I happy? Yes!
Is it ALL the time?
I still have a few layers..
Having expectations and seeing them not met with reality was somewhat of a downer. One day, talking to a very skilled medium/channel friend, (my mentors daughter Heidi Brooke) she said I needed a ceremony. My inner child had felt so unloved and unimportant and here I'd done all of this work but I hadn't celebrated any of it. In fact, I was disappointed. She said I needed a ceremony to really seal the deal.
And she was right.
So I thought about it for a few days and came to the conclusion that what my inner child really wanted for a ceremony was a party in her honor. Yes! A party for no reason other than to celebrate our being reunited. We would invite our friends.
- I don't even have birthday parties so this was a big deal.
I decided to wait until after Christmas so it wouldn't feel like a Christmas party but also not on New Years Eve so it wouldn't feel like a New Years Eve party. It had to be my party, and I wanted it before the years end so I could be ready for 2018 and all the wonderful things that will be happening next.
In considering who to invite I decided to stick with closer friends who I knew would not only not-judge me but who would celebrate with me and consider this inspirational. I decided not to invite family because a few of them would talk about me and judge me behind my back and I didn't want any of that energy touching this special day. Old me would feel guilty and responsible for their feelings. My resurrected self has healed those feelings and false beliefs.
So I planned something stress free to cook and made gluten free cupcakes (for myself) and bought fancy donuts for anyone who preferred them. I even went to Party City and bought decorations that made me feel happy. Old me would see this as an unnecessary expense, new me kept reminding myself that this is how people celebrate!
It was a very intimate gathering but that made it nice. My friend Tonya brought me a gift.
Now I get to think of how far I've come and how worthy I am of celebration anytime I see it. In the card she wrote "the bracelet was made by a woman in Guatemala - her hands worked each bead in hopes of lifting herself and the women in her community out of poverty. My hope is whenever you see it - you think FIERCE. That's how you love!"
I'm in the back with the wine glass and fabulous little bracelet. 😊
I really appreciated seeing my own children having fun at this party. My oldest, not pictured, was having a big-kids electronics-a-thon on the couch.
Everyone brainstormed and decided singing "happy healing to you" would be most appropriate for the occasion.
In all it was a wonderful evening with touching moments throughout. I feel like it was an appropriate ceremony and lesson in how to really honor oneself and ones own accomplishments. Don't just brush everything under the rug. Celebrate as many of the victories in life that you can, our lives are so much more beautiful than we take time to acknowledge.
Next, I'm thinking I can finally justify a fantastic reason for a tattoo. 😊