Nothing should be ok, and nothing should have been ok. We create standards that indoctrinate how our lives should have been, The problem is not with what form our lives had taken for a certain time but with the form in our minds that we want life to take. Life is somehow random in essence, It is not obligated to follow certain and predefined procedure as our minds/egos want it.
We can't suffer the lack of something we never believe ours and it is reliving to maintain a mental image of ourselves without it.