The fight with alcoholism.

in #life5 years ago

“A man who drinks too much on occasion is still the same man as he was sober. An alcoholic, a real alcoholic, is not the same man at all. You can't predict anything about him for sure except that he will be someone you never met before.”

― Raymond Chandler, The Long Goodbye

Playing Mind-Games.

I believe I am truly great at convincing myself to not have a problem with the substance of alcohol. I was blackout drunk 2 days 12 hours and 40 minutes ago. This has been an incredibly bad experience. Additionally, it appears like I hit rock bottom once again. Which I didn't. But it feels like that .

I was hanging out with some new buddies I made at work and we were drinking later in the day. I invited everyone to come to the brand new place I just acquired. For reasons unknown, I was super drunk. I can't remember anything. Merely the very first hour of the evening.

That's it for me. I told myself to quit drinking altogether. Only terrible things occur while doing that. At least to me. But what exactly are we anticipating? Putting toxins in our body and then behave alkaline or what?

Coping pain with alc.

Not too long ago my fiance and I decided to break up and that was kind of an indicator for me to start drinking again. I had been sober for half a year before that. I additionally told myself that I don't have any difficulties with alcohol since I could stay sober for half a year. Nice tricks my mind is playing on me.

I don't know what to expect with this post. I never truly talked about this issue. I've been hiding it as long as I can remember. Maybe some support? Maybe some tips? Maybe some experiences?

Etymology.

Additionally, I really like the Etymology of alcohol. I was studying about this some time ago and this genuinely resonated with me along with the experiences I made with the Substance.

“Alcohol” comes from the Arabic “al-kuhl,” which means “Body eating Spirit,” and this actually serves as the origin for the English word “ghoul.” According to Middle Eastern folklore, a ghoul is an evil demon believed to eat human bodies.

“Alembic” and “alcohol” are both metaphors for aqua vitae, or “life water,” and “spirit” refers to a distilled liquid, which came from Middle Eastern alchemy.

There is so much more to say. Perhaps in the future.

“Alcohol is the reduced form of spirit. Therefore, many people, lacking spirit, take to drink. They fill themselves with alcohol.”

― Carl Jung

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That Carl Jung quote really is insightful. We even call alcohol as "spirits"

Carl Jung was ahead of its time.

my sincere sympathies. To find a valid reason to avoid alcohol will be one of the great struggles of your life. The freedom to drink will be eventually crushed by the need to have a drink. You can stop if you really want. Eventually I hope that your pain without drink can overcome your pain with drink. Can it be done? Remember that the pain of being sober seems more than the calming fuzz of being intoxicated. Fascinating subject to me as I have never even tasted any form of liquor or beers.

Thank you for your sympathies!

To find a valid reason to avoid alcohol will be one of the great struggles of your life.

Very true. Feels like everywhere I go people consume alcohol. There are not that many places where people don't consume any form of liquor.

The freedom to drink will be eventually crushed by the need to have a drink.

Yes, it is going to be like that. I'm very positive right now. I know where I am going and I know where I don't want to be.

Can it be done?

100%

Fascinating subject to me as I have never even tasted any form of liquor or beers.

That's pretty good! Leave it like that! You're definitely not missing out on anything. There's so much pain involved.

Alcohol is something that numbs the pains of life and intensifies it at the same time, It's one of the biggest evils that's plaguing society and it's also being used as a system of control.
In the end it's a internal battle kill the demon or the demon will kill you...

Yes, that's true. I thought I already won. But seems like that's not the case.

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alcohol is First step to heaven :)

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