Wow. Thank you so much for taking the time to put together this response. What really good points, and lots to consider!

I do agree with the main point that you make, and we do try to find the right balance. It is hard to describe over the computer, but we will bring it up with people and discuss if it 'feels right'.

A lot of our friends and family do know that we are gay. We definitely don't hide it. At the same time though, we try to be mindful of other people's thoughts on the subject and avoid making it an uncomfortable subject if they don't seem to want to discuss it. I've found that people will bring it up if/when they are interested, and it is usually then that they are the most receptive.

It is a large part of who we are, but it also isn't who we are. We never really feel like we aren't being true to ourselves, or hiding our relationship when we don't bring it up or talk about it. There is a lot to our personalities and our friendship/relationship that go beyond the gay thing. Nobody who knows us would deny that we care deeply for each other, which is really the main thing that is most important (in my opinion).