Why are Women like buses? You wait all day for one then find out 48 other people in the local area have been riding on her.

What kind of shoe does Mr. T wear? T-shoes!

One time I saw a duck get hit by a wonder bread truck and that's pretty much why I try not to get too ambitious

What's better than roses on a piano? tulips on an organ!

Knock, Knock... Who's there? Peas. Peas who? *Peas pass the butter*