Hello.

I am Schmeve.

I am a failure to my people.

The Pooblys are an expansive clan, reclusive yet world-wide. We originate from a long line of writers, scientists, pillagers and stabby, illiterate drug-addicts. Derived from the objective study of these four most prevalent archetypes in our hereditary line four Pooblian disciplines have been developed within the lost knowledge of our most sacred of book, the Voynich Manuscript.

I am here to reconcile with my people so it is my mission here to practice these noble disciplines in front of all the free world so they may witness and learn.

The primary diet of all Pooblys involves the daily consumption of heavy amounts of the metaphysically ever-nourishing cream liquors as taught by our ancestral translation of the Voynich Manuscript. If I fail to uphold my mission the elders will deliver me to the Chamber of Cream Everflowing where I’ll drown the most joyous of deaths.

The cream is our life; the life is our cream.

Always when I drink cream I drink to my ancestors and my people, but today I also drank to thee, sweet Steemkin. You are also my people and I look forward to meeting you all.

Drink and cream forth!