China's New Handheld Weapon Tech Will Make You Sh!t Yourself.

The all-powerful, fun-loving Chinese government has created a new crowd control gadget; The gas-powered, sonic, ELF weapon is designed to injure willfully disobedient crowds of protesters. The new device uses low-frequency sound waves and vibrates the internal organs of those targeted.

Aside from causing extreme discomfort of which all “less-than-lethal” weapons do, it is unknown if its use will cause any permanent damage. Depending on the intensity and duration of exposure to these low frequencies, studies in the past have shown that low-frequency sound waves can cause: colon spasms, spontaneous fecal incontinence, puking, heart attacks, brain pain, nausea, and organ damage.

This technology reminds me of Taser International’s product. When they presented their taser to the American market vis-à-vis police stations nationwide, people started to die. So, to shift responsibility from electrocutioner to the electrocutionee, they blamed the victim for having an underlying condition which made them susceptible to a rare medical disorder called excited delirium.

In most cases, the combination of the two-words excited and delirium caused people’s eyes to glaze over and flip the channel. Oh, it wasn’t the cop’s fault; It was the dumb bastard who got electrocuted. There was something wrong with him; God put him into this world all fucked up, the man had a Taser disorder. How was the cop supposed to know?