People who Suck: Taking stake.

in #humor6 years ago

I don't want to start a flag war but, this has bugged me for a long time and I know it is a touchy subject that weirdly, many people take very seriously. But, it is time to bring it out into the open and stake my ground:

Vampires are Assholes.

There, it is done. I regret nothing. Let the flags fly.

The world has had an obsession with them for centuries and they appear in a million stories to scare little children into eating their garlic or to give silver stackers continuous market demand but, I gotta say, those that love Vampires... Crazy.

I mean, I get it, long lived, sexy, don't age and all that but if you have a look at their track records, it is no wonder so many people want to stake them through their dead hearts. Track records mean something don't they.

The problem I have with Vampires isn't their flying, or turning into bats, super strength or any of the other nonsense, it is their lack of community spirit. If they weren't such assholes, people would willingly donate their blood but, they have no sense of civic duty, no willingness to help.

Look at those tools from Twilight. Sure, the dad was a GP but the kids were hundreds of years old going to high school and picking up teenagers. Besides the pedophilia element to that, couldn't they have in all of their hundreds of years been doing something more useful than year 11 algebra?

What I would do if I had that kind of time to learn and create. Even the sleep patterns are awesome for productivity. When everyone is asleep, I would be able to be up working, inventing, researching without all the phones, and emails and humans to get in the way. Cancer? cured. Pollution? Gone. Free energy? Sure!

Vampires should be the Bomb but instead, they choose to be friggen' assholes that do nothing for society except suck the life blood out of the living. They don't even do that thinking about societal problems. Death by lethal vampire for the pedophiles. Well we know why they don't target them... Edward Cullen you sick bastard.

Yeah, they could quite happily live rockstar lives and have whoever they want if instead of skulking around in the dark scamming and killing, they solved some real world issues. But, maybe that is why they don't, they want to live their dark side which doesn't mean getting freaky, it means forcing people to do things they don't want to do. They are sadists, not much to love about sadists is there?

Yes, I know this is a very controversial topic but, essentially most of the existing problems are so because of blood sucking assholes who rather than do something that helps the community, they take every drop they can so to live out their sick fantasies by harming others.

There should be a new motto for Vampires:

Give more than you take, or get a stake.

Taraz
[ a Steemit original ]

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I'm glad I'm not alone. I just never saw it; for me, they were always just a bunch of self-indulgent twats.

lol. indeed.

This was great - a creative way to get your point across without calling out anyone specifically. I think the vampire-hunters should be doing more to stake the suckers instead of squabbling among one another. This platform won't work to it's potential unless they do.

It will take time to get it sorted as always but, it will get there. ...oh.. this was about vampires ;)

haha actually personaly i wanna meet some of them someday to figureout how speedy i am hahah

haha great article. I completely agree! Very funny and relevant.

Haha yes! This is the BOMB. Can definitely class some social circles as Vampires and would definitely be putting internet trollers into that category.

hahahaha you made me the day with this publication! Hahaha, you went by saying "if they were good people we would donate the blood." But in a certain part, you are right for so many centuries of life to produce more than terror, an eternity without contributions to humanity.
hahahaha and in the case of Edward Cullen I can not believe it is a vampire that shines!
Until the next friend @tarazkp I laughed a lot with your publication!

Give more than you take, or get a stake.

Your hilarious. I think you have hit the stake on the head though. If they were indeed nicer we could and gave back to the community think of the things we could achieve.

Sadly I am a fan of vampire fan fiction but I like pretty much anything with a fantasy or sci-fi element. Please don't hold it against me lol...

In the series being human. A vampire, a werewolf and a ghost all become unlikely friends live by together. So maybe it's possible that not all vampires are arseholes.

:D maybe, I am yet to meet a non-asshole vampire though personally.

I agree, but can't say it too loudly because I live in a liberal state filled with blood suckers and don't want to be accused of racism, bigotry, etc. LOL.

lolol... see, someone pays attention ;)

The vampires are everyhere!!
Some young, some old,
Some quite, some bold.
Wherever they are,
They're stealing our gold.

:)
I was going to add at the end 'a lot like bankers aren't they'

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