Letter to my father
I know my father was a strict man with his set standards, principles, and criteria. He was an honest government officer but not very ambitious otherwise he could have been in the ministry of Bhutan as the then crown prince of Bhutan was his classmate and he offered him this post.
ᵀʰᶦˢ ᶦᵐᵃᵍᵉ ᵒᶠ ᵐʸ ᶠᵃᵗʰᵉʳ ᶦˢ ᵐᵒʳᵉ ᵗʰᵃⁿ ⁵⁰ ʸᵉᵃʳˢ ᵒˡᵈ
My letter might sound rude to you but as I said this is going to be the occasion when I pour my heart out and also he is no more in this world to read it.
Respected Father,
You left us for your heavenly abode almost a decade ago, but I never engaged in a dispute with you, although there were occasions when I wanted to revolt. I did revolt, but not openly or show any disrespect for being an obedient son, but I will use this occasion to show my sentiments.
I was shocked to know that, despite knowing that I wanted to become a sportsperson, you always rejected my wish to play my favorite game, cricket, which I was sure would take me to my desired destination, the national team. Your decision was so painful that I could not bear it silently, but your decisions disturbed my inner peace and created a sense of revolution in my mind.
I cannot understand why you did not understand my wish that I always wanted to fly high in the sky with my passion for sports, writing, and traveling and select a career that would provide me with my desired opportunities.
Being your son, I fully respect your paternal feelings and wishes, but despite this, I feel that you had no right to take such decisions for me without consulting me. You knew that my views regarding the field of my future life were quite different from yours. I have always worked independently, and I wanted you to approve them, which you never cared to do.
I am sure you will remember that from the very beginning, you have been trying to make me agree that I should choose my future as per your wish, but you also know that I have always been against it. I never expressed my desire, but I never thought seriously about it.
You know we work according to a certain policy. My every step should be in accordance with this policy, my principles, and our program. Today, the situation is completely different. But if the situation had been different during my school and college days, I would have been the last person to prepare for the corporate sector.
All this time I had only one thought in front of me, and that was that I wanted to be a traveler, photographer, and sportsman, not what I became, although later I managed to follow my passion to some extent.
I tried my best to follow your words, but we both never completely agreed. My view has been that all youth should show indifference in such situations and should be free to choose their future in whatever way they like. All this time, my planning has been in accordance with this principle. Whether I succeeded in doing so or not is not my job to decide.
Today you are not in this world, and there may be differences of opinion on who was wrong, and maybe you are also one of those who have differences of opinion with me, but this does not mean that you should take such steps on my behalf without consulting me. I know that my opinion is not as valuable as I thought it was.
At least for me, my own thinking says that my principles of life should be saved so we adopted a plan, and I stuck to that plan till the end. I probably did not care how much I would have to pay personally for this, and I did. Now you are not in this world, but what you did from your side was the best in your eyes. And what I did may not have been liked by you, but I felt that it was a compromise between both of us.
Father, today I am feeling very sad that I could not follow you completely. I am afraid that by blaming you, or more importantly, by condemning your action, I may not be able to show my full respect towards a father, and my words may become too harsh. But I will definitely state my point in clear words. If any other person had behaved like this with me, I would not have tolerated it, but in your context, I will only say that it was my compulsion or perhaps my weakness because I was financially dependent on you to some extent.
This was a time when all of us were being tested. I will not say that you have failed this test, but I would like to apologize to you and say that you devoted your whole life to us but never asked what I wanted. I feel that at an important turning point in my life, you did something that was not for me, but perhaps it was your own dream.
In the end, I want to tell you that I disliked this step of yours even then, and even today, I am not in favor of presenting any defense for myself. If this were to be my future, then it is fine. I have no complaints with you now.
I would like to say that I have resolved some of the confusion in this regard, and there is no point in saying anything about those that have not been resolved. I know that you wanted a successful career for me, but you did not value my opinion or never took it into account.
Your son
Dev
I invite @weisser-rabe @casv, @josepha, and @senehasa to tell us about their father.
I hope you understand my feelings dear Steemians
When we are children or still very young we do not know the ways to handle those situations that corner us, we even do what our parents want to please them or sometimes to not lose their support.
Sometimes what we wish is that our parents could understand, even if it were only over the years...I think that in any case you were able to make your way to where you wanted. I think that as we become adults we discover this responsibility, that it is now up to us to direct our destiny.
You wrote a very sincere letter and with all respect towards your father...
Thanks for sharing.
In my case, it was just the opposite! I knew my abilities and how to achieve them but my father did not approve that I should select sports as my career because there was not as much money those days as now. However, I never wanted to be an engineer so I found a way out and did my business school so I could join the sales team and travel the world. Thank you so much for your kind words, my best regards!
Indeed your father was a great man, despite not having too many ambitions to pursue as of then when he was alive, the reason might he is satisfied with whatever he gets. He must be so proud of you, for being an ambitious son of his, and with the letter you have written for him, he will feel happier to have you as a beloved son of his. Thanks for the invite, I have submitted my entry already.
Thanks for your support and visit. I will come and read about your experience with your father ASAP. I am sure you have had a nice support while growing up. I had a different experience though than most youngsters do when they need support.
My dad tried so much for I and my brother's and sisters.
Some parents are like that; they want to see their children succeed and see them in places they could not go. It is unjust from your perspective, but that is how parents are, and we cannot blame them. He made you a man without murdering you, which is enough reason to admire him.
But that is you inner heart feelings. We know that some children can't rebel against their parents since they are their parents, but they despise them from the bottom of their heart. Dear Friend, @dove11, he made you a complete man, that is more than enough to forgive him. Good luck in the contest.
So true, all parents feel as if they were doing their children a favor by pushing them in a career which although within the reach but in most cases not liked by the children. However, I tried my best and did what I wanted to do but never let him know about my real intention.
I understood your success through your articles, stay safe. God bless you.
TEAM 5
Thanks for the support @o1eh, much appreciated.
Upvoted. Thank You for sending some of your rewards to @null. It will make Steem stronger.
https://x.com/simaodev11/status/1798947790707741055
Sir! It needs courage to write straight forward on public platform and you have this. You wrote your emotions in very straight forward style which is your signature style always and may be your words are too harsh but I know you are like coconut, which is hard in upper side but soft in inner side. Your father was strict but his upbringing is superb that's why we got @dove11 sir here.
Thanks, sir but trust me I have my own set norms of ethics like my father so I could be different for different persons as I never compromise with the rules. I was a strict corporate manager and now a stricter SR who looks for the betterment of this platform. Thanks again for being here with such kind words.
Saludos amigo!
Por lo que puedo apreciar en tu carta, tu padre trato de hacer de ti un gran hombre con una prospera carrera profesional, aunque muchas veces hay padres que se equivocan a intentar imponernos algo que no nos gusta y mas aun una carrera universitaria. Soy de las que piensa que uno debe estudiar lo que le gusta y con lo que se siente a gusto e identificado, porque si no, viviremos una vida triste, frustrada y llena de rencores, por hacer algo que no queríamos para nuestra vida.
Espero logres encontrar aquello que da felicidad a tu vida y lo que siempre deseaste ser.
Bendiciones.
Thanks, financially I got everything and am no longer in a regular job as I have just resigned. However, what I achieved through my hard work was not my childhood dream. I wanted a different career and not a corporate one. But the matter is finished now as there is no more left that I wish to achive.
Mi amigo, creo que todos los padres buscan que sus hijos logren lo que ellos deseaban lograr, y, que por una razón u otra no lograron hacerlo.
Me gusta que en tu carta le haces algunos reclamos a tu padre, pero con argumentos valiosos y con un lenguaje de respeto.
Tal vez si él estuviera vivo, también te pediría disculpas por haberte apartado del mundo de los deportes y de los viajes.
Lo maravilloso de todo esto es que, en esta etapa de tu vida, has logrado un equilibrio entre lo que tu padre quería para ti, y lo que tú deseabas hacer. De modo que el destino los compensó a ambos.
Me encantó leerte. Un abrazo fraterno.
No, definitely not! I was never disrespectful to my father despite all the differences of opinions. I agree we had differences of opinion as he was dead against games and sports but I wanted to be one. I managed a couple of my passions later but to be an international level sportsman was the dream I could not achieve. Thanks for your visit and support.
Es duro no lograr canalizar nuestros sueños.