The Feeling of Loneliness. Dealing With Loneliness [Part 2/2]

In our last episode, we took a look at some points on how to deal with loneliness and of course, how to prevent it. Just like we have established from our last episode that without appropriately dealing with loneliness, it can degenerate into many other ills like depression, and whatnot. We have looked at the effect of connecting with people physically and making new acquaintance in preventing loneliness. We also considered the fact that, while engaging in what makes you happy, like your hobby, you can distract yourself from the feelings that bring about loneliness. Here, we shall take the concluding part of the tips on how to deal with loneliness.

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1. Work on yourself and get better

If you find yourself not being able to keep friendship or people easily desert you or maybe people do not like hanging around you, and if this becomes a repeated occurrence, then you should ask yourself some questions, because it may be your attitude that is repelling them from you. The truth is, no matter how hungry a fly is, it will not go near a hot food. Similarly, if your attitude or character is too "hot" for people, they may begin to avoid you and you may become lonely in the long run. Trust me, the world is already getting nasty as the day goes by, and the last thing anyone would want is to add another nastiness from your attitude.

If you have ever been to a field of flowers, you will notice how bees and butterflies will be hanging around the field. This is because they are attracted to the sweetness of the nectar. In the same way, if your attitude is welcoming, you will not have any problem having people around you. As a matter of fact, they would want to become your friends. Always ask yourself if you will be okay to become friends with someone that has your kind of attitude. It is from your answer that you will know if you are really friendly or not.

It is saddening to hear some people attribute nature to their bad attitude. Well, just so you'd know, no excuse is tenable to cover up for a someone's bad attitude. The person that seem to be good only made a conscious choice and put in efforts to build up their good side. So you too can also build up yourself to a level where goodness will be reflected in your attitude. More so, there is no benefit in having a bad attitude, rather it will make one to lose friendships and acquaintances.

Some people may think that friendship or having people around is a function of one's beauty or one's outwards appearance. There are many beautiful and handsome people that are very lonely because of the singular reason that friendship does not depend on the beauty of your body but the beauty of your character. This the reason why more attention should be focused on building up of oneself, one's attitude and character. Learn how to relate with people and also know that the world does not revolve around you, so treat people with the same respect that you deserve and you will naturally attract people to yourself.

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2. See a therapist

There are sometimes that someone may have tried all other options and yet see themself having the feel of loneliness, it is time to talk to a therapist. It may not be enough to make friends or connecting with them physically, it is still possible for someone to still have that same feeling of loneliness with people around. When this happens, then you should seek for the services of someone trained in that field - a therapist. This is because there are some other causes that can lead one to loneliness, like medical factors, social factors (anxiety, etc), and this can effectively be dealt with by a trained professional.

There are some cases of loneliness in which the person has to undergo Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. This is a psychological treatment by a psychologist in which efforts are made to alter the overall behaviour of someone. That is, making the patient to learn how to overcome their problems by changing their behaviour for the better. This is one of the many few cases that the services of a psychotherapist is needed. However in all these things, one thing that you should bear in mind is this: "You are not alone."

Thanks for reading