@wakeupkitty, I like @sbamsoneu's style, I know that writing a story based on established aspects may not be easy for everyone but he tried, he has his own style and it made me smile, his story moved me.

Friend @sbamsoneu, something that works for me is the timer, use it, then you can fix it a little. Don't go overboard with the decorations. You had to keep in mind the healer, the piece of paper and the police touch. Maintain the expectation, imagine that you are the reader.