There is a saying in Urdu that "When a mother dies her children die with her". But it is the rule of the world that we have to live without our loved ones. I often wonder how one copes when their mother dies. I am not at all ready for this God bless all the mothers. The love you express towards your mother in your post is admirable. I pray for you that Allah gives you patience so that you can live a good life even without her.