wow , wow wow wow! i wasnt expecting such an amazing video!
you have articulated everything i didnt say... and your story is a beautiful one.,. AND you didnt even do the first workshop yet to prepare!
Isn't it weird how we never really ask that question! such basic simple question.. AND if we do we arent really listening, but just waiting to overlay them with our needs and demands... Sounds like that went superbly well for a first effort!
i REALLY think you GOt it.. and BOy can you communicate it..
Marshall also says he doesnt like the name NVC>>>.. i like to call it the language of the heart..
SO.. look out for the kids section in this first workshop.. and some of the videos are just inspiring, and very dutch!
I am really working on identifying my girls needs before letting my head take over our interactions, it is too easy to just react instead of pausing and as you so beautifully put, being mindful. Thank you for sharing this, I am really looking forward to this workshop as I know it can help me no end in my relationship with my girls xxx
You have a voice!!! (I've always wondered what you sound like lol)
Couldn't agree more on the name! I always imagined it as "passive," which I am not. Mindful communication sounds more fit, but whatever. It's not the title that matters, but the idea I suppose.
Thats a cool idea, starting a conversation with "what are your needs?" Might be something we could implement in the community chat as a welcome. @riverflows, @alchemage, @vincentnijman, @missdeli, @plantstoplanks, (tag other elders that I've forgotten) what do y'all think?
Let it be announced I have 4 new twitter followers today.... 🤣 thanks heaps for showing up. 💚 Im expecting YOU to sound a bit gruff & throaty with a southern drawl. 🤣
I think that everyone is different in their communication style... but I'm of the opinion that it is never constructive when someone gets aggressive... lol, at least it isn't with me because they won't get anythoing outta me if they come at me that way.
I guess some people just accept it in work life and personal life, but honestly, unless you're a verbal bully, then there is no reason to put up with it. A good example from my life is my uncle. He gets incensed when I smile at him and just turn my back and walk away when he's trying to verbally brow beat me, usually over either politics or my life choices.
In my experience, as I've grown older, I've found it increasingly easier to remove myself from those situations, and even never end up in them in the first place. Of course, the real mastery is being able to steer people like that to a more constructive and less aggressive stance in the discussion... not sure I'm there yet ;-)
yup! we can walk away and stuff the emotions in.. or we can confront and vent and get all angry.. but neither ways really ever solve anything or help us... ive learned how NVC really just jumps straight to the needs... and suddenly we realise were finally talking about the right thing!
I'm my example, with my uncle, although I often manage to extracate myself from his aggressive energy... no conclusion is reached. I'm pretty sure his need to dominate conversations and push his world views are based on deep seated insecurities, but with my strategy in dealing with him I'll never get to the truth of it. And also, we'll never have a positive relationship, which is sad.
You put it well at the end of your comment:
suddenly we realise were finally talking about the right thing!
I think people so often get stuck in a projected idea of what the other person is saying, based on their own preconditioning. And so, they end up talking entirely about the wrong things.
wow , wow wow wow! i wasnt expecting such an amazing video!
you have articulated everything i didnt say... and your story is a beautiful one.,. AND you didnt even do the first workshop yet to prepare!
Isn't it weird how we never really ask that question! such basic simple question.. AND if we do we arent really listening, but just waiting to overlay them with our needs and demands... Sounds like that went superbly well for a first effort!
i REALLY think you GOt it.. and BOy can you communicate it..
Marshall also says he doesnt like the name NVC>>>.. i like to call it the language of the heart..
SO.. look out for the kids section in this first workshop.. and some of the videos are just inspiring, and very dutch!
https://steemit.com/ecotrain/@eco-alex/non-violent-communication-workshop-1-join-us
GO YOU! really powerful words. SO happy to be doing this even if its just for you..
<3
Im liking 'language of the heart'. 😍 Starting to feel a tad neurotic about my dutch communication habits. LOL...
I am really working on identifying my girls needs before letting my head take over our interactions, it is too easy to just react instead of pausing and as you so beautifully put, being mindful. Thank you for sharing this, I am really looking forward to this workshop as I know it can help me no end in my relationship with my girls xxx
Looking fwd to your parenting perceptions & experience with this course.... this "mom thing" is one heck of a big responsibility, no??
You have a voice!!! (I've always wondered what you sound like lol)
Couldn't agree more on the name! I always imagined it as "passive," which I am not. Mindful communication sounds more fit, but whatever. It's not the title that matters, but the idea I suppose.
Thats a cool idea, starting a conversation with "what are your needs?" Might be something we could implement in the community chat as a welcome. @riverflows, @alchemage, @vincentnijman, @missdeli, @plantstoplanks, (tag other elders that I've forgotten) what do y'all think?
I like that idea... what about changing the Welcome bot??
Changing the welcome bot.... now that's a progressive & helpful step forward. 💚
Yes! That'd be super cool, that thing hasn't been updated in a while huh?
Let it be announced I have 4 new twitter followers today.... 🤣 thanks heaps for showing up. 💚 Im expecting YOU to sound a bit gruff & throaty with a southern drawl. 🤣
I'll spare you the disappointment and continue not speaking in my rare videos 🤣
🤣🤣🤣
I think that everyone is different in their communication style... but I'm of the opinion that it is never constructive when someone gets aggressive... lol, at least it isn't with me because they won't get anythoing outta me if they come at me that way.
I guess some people just accept it in work life and personal life, but honestly, unless you're a verbal bully, then there is no reason to put up with it. A good example from my life is my uncle. He gets incensed when I smile at him and just turn my back and walk away when he's trying to verbally brow beat me, usually over either politics or my life choices.
In my experience, as I've grown older, I've found it increasingly easier to remove myself from those situations, and even never end up in them in the first place. Of course, the real mastery is being able to steer people like that to a more constructive and less aggressive stance in the discussion... not sure I'm there yet ;-)
Great, and thought provoking video @artemislives
yup! we can walk away and stuff the emotions in.. or we can confront and vent and get all angry.. but neither ways really ever solve anything or help us... ive learned how NVC really just jumps straight to the needs... and suddenly we realise were finally talking about the right thing!
You've kind of hit on the crux here Alex.
I'm my example, with my uncle, although I often manage to extracate myself from his aggressive energy... no conclusion is reached. I'm pretty sure his need to dominate conversations and push his world views are based on deep seated insecurities, but with my strategy in dealing with him I'll never get to the truth of it. And also, we'll never have a positive relationship, which is sad.
You put it well at the end of your comment:
I think people so often get stuck in a projected idea of what the other person is saying, based on their own preconditioning. And so, they end up talking entirely about the wrong things.
You nailed it thère.... "people get stuck in a projected idea of what the person is saying."
Glad you liked the video & hoping to hear-read you re #nvc soon!! Thanks for stopping by.