Dear Diary: It Is My Dialysis Today And I Could Not Wait Anymore Again

I am already waterlogged and every bit of food and drink that goes into my body makes me feel like I am drowning. But I still have to eat because I could not afford to lose some more body weight and it will just make things worse for me.

Gaining weight has been a problem and I do not know what really is the cause of it while other patients that had been in dialysis for a long time doesn't lose weight like me. Pretty odd but maybe I needed to eat more since I really do not meet my daily calorie requirements.

I might consider in what I am thinking which is to transfer into another dialysis center to our town's hospital despite the added fee that I will have to pay because the treatment in my dialysis center is not as good as before. The blood pump is too slow, only 200 mL per minute and I have to bargain to make it 250 mL per minute which is also too slow for a regular dialysis.

Then they have this thing like a maximum fluids that can be taken from me which means if I would load up to four kilos of water they would only take 3 kilos leaving me to go home not fully taken off with water. Then next time I go to the center I will be heavier than before because I already have an extra water weight which only leaves me with not much allowance.

Source
It Will be Hard To Transfer To Another Center But I Needed Some Changes In My Dialysis

In short I am slowly drowning and my blood pressure suffers as it shoots up to 180/90 which oddly enough is okay with them, they are not alarmed with that kind of blood pressure which makes me lose my confidence in that current dialysis team in my center.

Maybe things will get better soon and I hope that my body would last until I could transfer to another dialysis center and make some positive impact in my current status because sometimes I am having this small seizures which I suspect to be caused by my high blood pressure and it should not be the case because for one thing I could get a stroke and I do ant that to happen.