Dear Diary: I Feel Like I Have A Mouthpiece And It Is Frustrating To Talk

in #health6 years ago

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My palette in the roof of my mouth continues to enlarge and it both frightens and worries me because of the uncertainty it brings me. I don't know if it will stop but it seems that my face enlargement is still going and it is really horror of a reality that this issue to my health is battering me not only to my mental foundations but also against my entire soul.

I just wish to just pass away soon but then again I have my plans to keep just to show the world that I can win over these mountains of a problem in my health. I also have some plans for my family to make them comfortable after I leave so those are my driving force for wanting to go on.

But I don't know why I am keeping on living while other patients just dies faster, sometimes just months after being a dialysis patient while I myself have a bone and pain disorder in combination and just lives and outlives most of my dialysis contemporaries.

Today I just used my wheelchair coming from bathing because I could not walk anymore back to my bed. But I am thankful that somehow I could still bathe myself and I am truly grateful still that I have some of my functions but I pray to God not to allow more disabilities, I could not take them anymore.

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You're a wonderful person and you've been chosen to fight a battle that most of us have never experienced. It must be very difficult. Stay strong.

Glad to see you supporting @cryptopie

I am trying to just enjoy the things in life that I could salvage which are seemingly negligible to most people like enjoying the taste of the foods that I like which only happens during dialysis, and the times that I could feel less pain in my body, and the love and care of my parents and friends in the world, they comfort me and I appreciate it with all my heart @donkeypong

@cryptopie Maybe your driving force to live makes you a good example for others who are also afflicted by sickness no matter what status they are. Just spread the positivity.

I agree with You. There's a reason and a purpose he has to fulfill.

Asi es @cryptopie hay que ser agradecidos con Dios por estar vivos todos los dias y lo de los otros pacientes de Diálisis demuestran que eres un guerrero y no te dejas vencer tan fácil

@cryptopie, I am so sorry that you are going through the things that you are going through. Your strength through all of this is an inspiration.

I think that one thing that keeps you going is your strong mind, good heart, intelligence and will to survive. Please stay strong and don't ever give up, my friend. You are cared for, and God is watching over you.

I just thank God for the friends like you that can change the lives of some people and you also inspire me to move along with life and never to give up because there is till hope and being idle is not the solution for my current condition because it will not do me any better.
It is just better to cling to my goals and it keeps my mind to temporarily get out from thinking about my problems and it does help @nuthman

All we can do is live life with the tools that we have been given. You have been given a very difficult situation, but you have also been given a good mind and determination to push through to the other side.

Nothing, no matter how horrible is permanent. Always remember that. You will have peace!

You are by far the strongest steemian. You are an inspiration to people. You show others what courage and strength truly is. Stay strong!

I will just keep on going Sir @hanshotfirst not just for myself but also for my parents because I also have some goals for my folks and to keep them safe when I am no longer around.

I don't believe in saying encouraging words to people just to make them feel good or better, but I fully put my trust in the words of the only one in which his word has never failed from time immemorial. The word of my Father and King, the Lord Jesus.
In "Isaiah 43:19'",
Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.
For the fact that your still out there with breath in you, it means he's got plans for you.
#Keep-the-Faith!!

You don't have to hate yourself. <3

I am not happy to see your photo today. You are in trouble but I have no ability to help you. Please, God help him.

Keep calm all will be good to you as i told you earlier you inspire all of us

Much encouragement, friend, do not worry, @cryptopie.

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