Most of my life I thought that happiness is a goal in life.
After all, if you and everyone around you is happy then you must have done everything right. As a result it seemed best to manage life and things I touched in a way to make as many people as possible around me happy.
This includes, my friends, girlfriends, wife family co-workers bosses and people that report to me.
Heck if you have a pet would you not simply worry about its happiness?
That's all very nice
That is all very nice. And in fact being nice to people seemed to be a key part of my strategy. You can walk around the planet and make so many people smile just by being nice.
When in college my girlfriend said " I don't know anyone like you that just puts a smile random people everyday" of course they then keep on telling me how that makes me very special etc.
The problem as a man all this is not very useful. It's easy to me nice and kind and to be liked. The problem as a man I want to achieve things.
I could easily be at home not work and just be happy. In fact happiness is pretty much a choice, it's super simple to be happy as long as you make a decision to do so.
But it does not get me anywhere. So I basically came to a new conclusion: My purpose in life as a man is not be happy. And for what I actually want my purpose to be it is far more useful to be unhappy and driven as it will be far more motivating to get shit done.