MY HAIKU - SUGAR

in #haiku6 years ago (edited)

Haiku was an unknown field for me and many times I get fascinated by the sheer brilliance of the combination or words that resulted in a Haiku, special mention to @rlt47 who was my mentor in this field and always played a crucial role in supporting me in trying a Haiku. Not to forget the involvement of @ainie-kashif who is inspiring every one in the group to grow big in Steemit.

I was trying to find my feet in this platform after a gap of one week and I made a stop over in some of my friends page and I struck up with the Haiku post (https://steemit.com/haiku/@rlt47/an-original-haiku-temptations-sugar) when the Haiku subject Temptation itself tempted me to maake a Haiku and here it is

Temptations - Sugar

Magic word it is
Sweet in the world of romance
blood sugar it sours

stock-photo-overweight-man-and-woman-eating-large-sugar-foam-or-sweets-brick-wall-background-1079218127.jpg

diabetes-2130236_960_720.jpg

Hope it qualifies for a haiku....

With love

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Clap for those sweet haiku lines. One more tried and you are successful again. Excellent attempt, ofcourse @rlt47 And @ainie.kashif both are great personalities, they always support and push us do something new. Keep it up and remember, never give up.😊

Feels so happy to hear such nice compliment...I too wonder whether it is worth to publish and such words removes my fear...
Good to have people like you around...Hope your pain is Ok now...Take care

Most welcome @angelro, I also feel happy to see such nice work done by you guys! Those are only 2 or 3 lines but these really take efforts to think and write. That’s why the work need to be appreciated and you deserve it. Take care and have nice weekend.😊

Delighted to hear such a warm compliment that comes straight trom the heart. It is really energy giving inspiration. Thank you.

You too should try as we did. you can start with the subject Fashion and we will follow.

Hope your days are good Have a nice day Shanu...

@angelro, lovely haiku! It certainly qualifies as a haiku, as a free style one.

If you going for the 5-7-5 arrangement, check the 2nd line...

Sweet in the world of romance

Sweet + in + world + of + ro + mance = 6 syllables. Remember syllable changes at the change of sound.

try something like -
As + we + ro + mance + the + sweet + world = 7 syllables

Thanks a lot my friend... In fact it is a confidence boosting reply which makes me to ponder more about such stuffs.

And regarding the numbers and syllables, let me share my secret. While googling to know more about Haiku I came across few sites that simply gives the statistics once you type the lines. I will give you the link tomorro from office,

But thanks for noticing the errors, I will be more careful.

@angelro - I have to watch these errors too, sometimes I make them as well.

I am happy with that because i know u must be right most of the time and I welcome thoze review from d heart

Yes @angelro, straight from the heart, my friend!

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