@blind-spot - My name is Tammy so this post caught my eye. I hope no one would compare me to your Tammy though. You are in a bad situation and you are miserable. It's easy to sit back and tell someone to walk away from a bad relationship but it's much harder to be the person who has to do it. From what you have written (poured out your heart) you already know that this is not the soul mate that you deserve.
Tammy has some real issues and maybe one day she will wake up and look back at the lives she has trifled with and the pain she has caused. But @blind-spot you only have one life to live and it's too precious to waste it being miserable. I was in a bad marriage that lasted for 28 years. Of course it wasn't bad at first, there were good times, and I have two wonderful sons as a result. But when it got to the point when I avoided going home after work and looked for reasons to not be at home, I had to face the fact of my unhappiness and take the plunge to start a new life. I met a great man a few years later and I am so thankful that I made that move to get out of that first relationship.
For your own sake, sanity, and happiness my heartfelt advice to you is to move on. There is someone out there for you!
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