45x still to go

Less than a week ago it was my birthday and already today, we were celebrating another. It is almost like there are birthdays on every day of the year. Today's was my great Aunt's birthday though and she turned 90. 90! That is crazy. That means she was born in 1928, just think of all the things she has seen and the life she has lived. Depressions, wars, moon landings (She was 41!), political assassinations, family poverty and all the technological changes in between. You know what though, there she was... smiling.

Perhaps this is something everyone needs to remember in this world, that at the end of the day, even someone who has faced immense hardship like she has in her life, a smile is still possible and when one looks back at it all, it can still be a good life. Perhaps a lot of the things we tend to worry about aren't actually so important in the big scheme of things but, in the moment they are experienced, that is all there seems to be.

Today I ran on a field kicking a ball, ate some food, had a nap, laughed and played with my cousins, got lots of kisses from lots of people, jumped, collected fist-fulls of gravel, crawled like a bear, did some silly walks, ate a cupcake, kicked pine cones and, took some selfies with Daddy. It was a good day.

I am two, I am not going to remember it most likely or, I am not going to remember it the way it actually was, perhaps fragments and, potentially through these very words where I will build a picture of the day in retrospect and make new memories my representation of the past. Is it a bad thing not to remember? Perhaps it is more important just to show up and do and not worry about where it will lead.

Today, I heard a plane coming and excitedly looked for it until I saw it. It was a big plane and I was so happy and watched it until I couldn't see it anymore. One of my relatives from the US said, "look, she will be a pilot." It is funny isn't it, how based on a tiny fragment of a moment, someone starts to imagine 30 years into the future? It was the first day he had ever met me and doesn't know anything else I can do but, makes a call.

I wonder, when my Great Aunt was two, did people make calls on her life also? Were they right? Did they predict all the difficulties she would have and all the challenges that would influence her path? I would say predictions were made and, none of them were likely correct, even though I could potentially be.

Who knows, maybe I will be a pilot one day but the goal is that if I make it 45x more through this life than I have, no matter what I have faced, I will still be able to smile widely like my Great Aunt was today.

<3
Smallsteps