I doesn't have much to do with the topic, but, believe it or not, my friend was hit by a deer (hoof)! It was a mother deer protecting her baby from my overly cuddling friend in a baby zoo. : )

Speaking of Kung Fu, I beleive that Jackie Chan almost killed me dozens of times while I was younger, I loved his movies (especially with Owen Wilson)!

Most of the deaths you described are funny (not a nice to admit but it's true), however, Sigurd the Mighty has died maybe in a most bizarre way in the history.