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RE: When Your Math Teacher Has an Accent...

in #funny7 years ago

I know I'm a cool cat, lol, I definitely don't question that. And accepted here? Hee, that's kind of an understatement at this point, definitely not in doubt. I woke up to this comment from rigaronib this morning: "You give me hope for this platform" After reading hans calling me a hundred percent class act yesterday...actually I could really spend some time tooting my own horn in this regard, though the fact that there happens to be a ton of great people in this place factors highly into this. For example rigaronib is fantastic and hans is just as classy.

I think I finally understand the problem here. And it's mine, not yours. A misunderstanding. You see, your ability and more than that, desire to have conversations, or as you put it 'chill, relax and get to know people' is, to my mind, at odds with not getting close to them. It created confusion for me, because it's not in me to spend a great deal of time with someone and not feel a deeper connection.

So we are opposites in that sense, you need things to stay...you said level, I would say at the surface, maybe they're the same. I don't know how to do that. I mean I can maintain polite relationships with people, if I don't spend a lot of time with them. But that's different than this. I have never been in this position before, I'm kind of at a loss to be honest. I'm not mad at you, I don't blame you, if that's who you are, then that's who you are. The only problem is, I don't know how to backtrack. Myself. I know you didn't realize you were hurting people when you disappeared, I know it wasn't intentional. I get it now, because based on what you're saying you wouldn't feel that way about anyone if they did what you did. So how could you know? But I made some inaccurate assumptions and unfortunately for me, I care very much about you. i can't even tell you how...let's just say that every other person on here that I've gotten really close to, we have exchanged information that would prevent us from not knowing if something terrible happened to one another. Paul? I could drive to his house if need be, that's only if his phone wasn't working...you get the picture.

If you don't feel things at a deeper level about people or allow yourself to, or whatever it is that you're saying exactly, then...this is where I keep coming up short, shit, lol. I don't want to upset you, if that's even possible from what you're saying. But I'm not sure I can continue like this with you. You may not get that, and I'm sorry. Like I said, it's my fault, my misunderstanding. But if you have the ability to feel empathy, then here's my situation. You-unintentionally I know- caused me some serious pain. I thought something might have happened to you...and this occuring basically after the beginning of this misunderstanding that did not get cleared up until now. I don't know how to be the kind of non friend, friend, that you want. I don't think I can be that. I can't be fake Damien, that's the issue here, and it would be fake. Polite when I don't know someone, that I can be. But after months of getting to know someone, yeah, I don't know how to backtrack. Relationships develop and move forward in my world, or they evaporate because there's nothing substantial to maintain them. I'm sorry. Truly. If it even bothers you or you need the apology, I don't know about either. I've not known someone like you before. From what you're saying, you don't develop feelings that would get hurt, so I guess this shouldn't bother you. But if by any chance it does, know that I would hate that, I would not want to hurt you.
Maybe when I wrap my head around it better I can figure out something.
Or if you thought it was possible to move forward in friendship and wanted to give it a try, I'll be here.

I hate ending on that note, so I'll just say, I love your art and your stories, please don't stop creating. You're hilarious, and gifted and going places. And I promise if I can find a way to separate myself, I'll be back.

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Thanks for opening up. Looks like I need to work on being a better friend. I also have something set up now so if something were to happen to me, you folks will hear about it. I'd say more, but I keep hitting my teeth every time I put that foot in my mouth and I don't want to be sore tomorrow... SMILE!

I really appreciate this. And really all we need is to know you're safe if you have to leave again for a period, so if you have something in place, that's awesome.
The foot in the mouth thing? That's my specialty, haha, welcome to my world ;)
I'm smiling, looking forward to today's post which is guaranteed to turn that into a grin!

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