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RE: Vacation (An Alliterative Poem, Freewrite #37: Coconut)
I enjoyed this piece. It was very image laden. Thank you! Wow. This is an excellent expression of deliberate practice and intent. You inserted images I could see. I could feel the wind off the waves almost hear the roar of surf and children playing nearby. Yes.
I think back a few months and your poetry was not like this; it was more abstract.
I was waiting for a revelation or a commentary on what it meant. Or what the significance of these images were. Did they change you. Did they change the speaker? I kept waiting for the turn like a sonnet or the last line of a haiku.
Keep it up. I enjoyed this!
Oh right, I remember! Yeah, steemit has helped me grow tremendously. There are obviously still pieces that would need work, but I am glad that I'm doing much better :D
And wow, I'm surprised and humbled to how much you liked this! A huge thank you for your comment!