Do I know it is stupid to smoke? Yes, for sure. Do I know I am killing myself? You bet!

I know exactly how you feel. I used to be a smoker for about 10 years and I was trying to quit during half of that time. It's so hard to quit even though I knew all the bad things smoking was doing to me. It was one of the most challenging things I have done in my life. I sincerely hope you succeed and become a non-smoker, too.