Are you still in NYC? I think your squabbles and arguments are from the NY vibe, lol. Its very busy, stressful and no matter what, everyone is in a hurry to get somewhere just to wait so it wears on you. I just moved from there to Socal last year to save my sanity, hahaha.

If you like spicy asian, you've got to go to Xi'an Famous Foods. There are a few locations by now, but the one under the Manhattan Bridge in chinatown feels the most authentic to me. They pull the noodles right there in front of you for each order.