Finish the Story - Sharp Clouds in Eden - @f3nix

in #finishthestory5 years ago (edited)

1. Finish the Story.jpgIntro:

As the seasons went on, she had not yet accustomed to that sight.

The expanse of clouds unfurled just beyond the edge of the plateau like a harmonious and yet restless carpet, woven from ranks of industrious angels. Only the blue condor, curious to taste the rarefied ozone flavor, occasionally tried to pierce the milky diaphragm.

An unnamed and timeless plateau. It had always belonged to that celestial ocean, cradled by its waves like the head of a gigantic primeval tortoise, asleep for thousands of years.

The woman sat absorbed on the black basalt edge. Lying on her knees stood a tablet with elusive colors. Her tapered fingers danced over it decidedly, following the counterpoint of secret music. A warm upward current ruffled her thick brown hair until she was forced to give in and stop the dance, hastily moving the curls from her forehead.

She procrastinated, holding back her knowledge on the tips of those solitary fingers that, slowing down, now left room for memories. Now the memories were transmuting, stretching in long meditating axons, which she watched parading before her eyes at the capricious rhythm of the clouds.

The plateau had no name and, at the same time, kept all the names, including those that she wanted to forget.

The fingertips resumed drumming on the iridescent surface of the tablet to stop almost immediately. As always, before even hearing him approach, she had felt his eyes on the back of her head.

"I'm almost done, Heitor." It was not true, but she tried to comfort her husband as her fingers flew frantically, receiving small luminous epiphanies from the device.

“Debes beber, mi amor. Al menos esto.” He sat close and gently pushed forward the cup of muña until the mint's scent convinced her to stop and take a couple of quick sips. Hidden among the gestures of daily care, she could not ignore a note of concern in her husband's voice.

"We were fine here until it lasted, weren't we?" The words came out crumpled, making their way slowly through the wood of thoughts. He raised an asymmetric smile at her and blinked the way she liked.

Her distinctive wrinkle of concentration formed between her eyes, two delicious hazelnut drops, while she sighed.

"You know it does not help us, mi vida. I'll join you as soon as I can." At that moment, the importance of what she had to do was the perfect alibi not to raise her gaze on him. She silently kept repeating to herself that this wasn't a goodbye.

The vibrating bark of the imperial ship came suddenly. As it emerged, the clouds frayed around the cobalt metal frigate like impotent fingers, in the last desperate attempt to hold back a blind, deep-water fish.

She watched her husband run back to the house, as planned.

"Let the show begin, bastards." She thought while the ship's jaws already spewed out a black phalanx, heading at a steady pace in the direction of the woman.

"Kalliska Pan, Imperial Master Grower, you're under arrest on evidence of desertion and high treason. Do not resist and follow us spontaneously or I will not hesitate to order coercive measures against you. "

"The Empire has no sovereignty over this soil. Be careful what you do, Colonel. "

"Master Grower, you have lost all diplomatic immunity. I repeat: do not resist. "

"I know the reason for your visit, Colonel. And I regret having to point out that you are not in the position to order anything. We could save time if you left your pathetic bluff right away. "

In an abrupt gesture toward the guards, the black leather of the colonel's glove stood out against the diaphanous sky. "You all. Back to the ship now."

The warm upward current strenghtened, making the imperial frigade's hull resound like a grim stork. They were alone. She held the Colonel's stare.

"There's still time to fix this, Kal .."

"Since long already you have lost any right to call me like that, Musashi"

While even the clouds seemed to stop, the fingers of the Master Grower continued to dance.

My Entry:

Kalliska Pan, her husband Imperial Master Grower, and Colonel Musashi, all stood in a circle without speaking, as if meditating while staring at the grass in the center of their circle.

The sounds of natural ambience became pronounced. The wind rustled the plant life, birds sung songs, and a creek rambled along yards away from their feet.

“Remember when we were all training to become Jedi?” Asked Colonel Musashi almost with fondness.

“Yes, I do, only we are not all ready for the ways of the Jedi. Only Kalliska made it through the final stages,” said Imperial Master Grower.

“Yes, that’s true. I became a Colonel of my own space armada, you a Master Grower of all plant life, and Kalliska the greatest Jedi in the Galaxy. Only why do you run away from the civilization you serve to hide on this remote planet?”

“It’s because of my Jedi training,” answered Kalliska. “We must find the balance for optimal growing conditions. The core of the galaxy has become too industrial. This solar system in this outer spiral arm happens to be the region where solar systems ripen into healthy ecosystems. For this reason, plants thrive in their earliest generations.”

“Kalliska's right. The soil, the temperature, the air quality, and the amount of rain are perfect for plant life. It’s like a planetary green house. We just manage our special plants needed to advance Jedi training. It never really ends for Kalliska you know,” said her husband the Master Grower.

“Yes, only why can’t you keep us informed? We could have convoys harvesting crops for shipments back to the Galactic Core. There are starving children in the planetary cities that would enjoy fresh fruits from an optimal growing zone.” Said the Colonel, hoping that his old friends would jump onboard with his mission here to this far away place on the edge of the Galaxy.

“Don’t you see . . . if we do that it will pollute what we are trying to preserve here on this planet. With civilization and food quotas we’ll be put under all this pressure and strain. The plants will as well, the ones needed for Jedi training, and so the integrity of inner peace gets disrupted.” Kalliska explained.

“Sounds like a Jedi mind trick to me,” joked the Colonel.

“Can we remain here undisturbed Musashi? If you try to kill us; we will kill you. My wife’s Jedi powers keep growing infinitely. She’s like the mother plant of the galaxy. You know the Force guides us to maintain the balance,” added the Master Grower.

“Yes Colonel. We can coexist like we have. However, any attacks will only lead to larger attacks until we destroy the Galaxy. It has been written. Believe me. Don’t start the prophecy as a friend,” pleaded Kalliska.

“You guys are way too deep for me. I’m just a soldier in the Empire. You know the deal. You’re under arrest, and if you don’t leave this planet with me then I’ve been ordered to kill you both. As friends, I can leave you two here only with an agreement on food shipments to the Galactic Core. They’ll be back here to set that up either way.” The Colonel stated the facts.

“OK. Tell them we’ll wait here to prepare manifests on vegetable grows and other edible fruits. The Empire has never eaten food so good,” said the Master Grower.

“Perfect, I’ll be on my way then.” And the Colonel turned and walked back to his spaceship.

Kalliska held the hand of her husband the Master Grower to watch an old friend leave this planet. Only they both knew they would need to leave as well. They had to find a perfect planet for growing plants that the Empire could not find. She knew the Force would help.

Thank you,
Cyrus Emerson

Also, available from the Author:

Fear and Loathing in the State of Jefferson - ebook
https://read.amazon.com/kp/embed?asin=B079R5KLPN&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_GsURAbAVDYNEM

Lost Angel – Introduction with Ray Manzarek of The Doors
https://www.downpour.com/lost-angel?sp=249812

Red Roses - audiobook
https://www.audible.com/pd/Fiction/Red-Roses-Audiobook/B07F2LWHPN

Sort:  

I wonder if Kalliska and her husband also cultivated hemp. If it was good, according to the Master Grower's skills, now I understand the reason for the Colonel's visit! Very original and cinematic mashup.

Sounds about right. The new book is now available for free on Amazon with Kindle Unlimited:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07MVPT72Q/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_.ONrCbHS01DDV

Will make it available for free during my book release annoucement on Wednesday. Of course any feedback is welcome as I have two weeks for revisions. Then on to the print edition and The Wishing Shelf Book Awards!

You made Heitor the Master Grower and not Kalliska Pan, this is an interesting change of perspective and a way to make a character more interesting that I could not exploit well

Solo's on Netflix. Ha ha

Exactly. A little over on the word count with this awesome prompt.

Oh, don't worry. I was over too haha.

A pint to you for setting your tale in the Star Wars universe! 🍺 For a moment, I was thinking that Kallisha was Kalliska's husband's name but thankfully your great dialogue sorted that out.

The explanations for why they fled, the need for balance guided by the force and the Colonel's acknowledgement that he's but a cog in the wheel answered so many of the questions left from the opening with the style with your distinctive style! You carried on the underlying strain to the bonds of friendship from the beginning with an expert touch. Adding in that the use of the food produced could be used to feed those who were starving versus the strain such production would put on the planet portrayed the conflict to be steeped in shades of gray . Each side has their reasons for their choices and the decisions that they are standing by.

Kudos to you for creating a terrific way for the two to stall the prophecized fight and buy themselves time to find another planet to continue growing plants that would be free from the oppressive grip of the Empire.

A great entry from you and you've me wanting to read what will happen when the armada returns to find the two have disappeared again.

Thanks for the feedback. So odd to have the name wrong. When I read @calluna's story earlier thought she must have changed the name. No bother, think they all say "Kalliska" now. Proof of another dimension?


This post was shared in the Curation Collective Discord community for curators, and upvoted and resteemed by the @c-squared community account after manual review.
@c-squared runs a community witness. Please consider using one of your witness votes on us here

Well told, and a nice Star Wars twist.
Your story does presents a moral dilemma. The Jedi seem to be moved by the hoarding force :) People can always find a reason not to share.
I think obi one kenobi would be disappointed. 😇

Ha ha. Your probably right about that.

Congratulations! This post has been upvoted from the communal account, @minnowsupport, by cyemela from the Minnow Support Project. It's a witness project run by aggroed, ausbitbank, teamsteem, someguy123, neoxian, followbtcnews, and netuoso. The goal is to help Steemit grow by supporting Minnows. Please find us at the Peace, Abundance, and Liberty Network (PALnet) Discord Channel. It's a completely public and open space to all members of the Steemit community who voluntarily choose to be there.

If you would like to delegate to the Minnow Support Project you can do so by clicking on the following links: 50SP, 100SP, 250SP, 500SP, 1000SP, 5000SP.
Be sure to leave at least 50SP undelegated on your account.

I love this sentence:

The sounds of natural ambience became pronounced.

Great ending :)

Hello @cyemela, thank you for sharing this creative work! We just stopped by to say that you've been upvoted by the @creativecrypto magazine. The Creative Crypto is all about art on the blockchain and learning from creatives like you. Looking forward to crossing paths again soon. Steem on!

You pick this up with such beautiful descriptions, then bam, jedis, ahhh it's brilliant. The exchange just flows so well, and the way it builds up to the ending <3

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.28
TRX 0.12
JST 0.033
BTC 70018.15
ETH 3794.54
USDT 1.00
SBD 3.75