Oh i like how you've taken a different sort of approach to this. The body belonging to someone else entirely, and then the scroll, you bring in new elements that really add to it. The message on the scroll is interesting, was he trying to attain the impossible in being able to foresee the consequences to this actions (a nice moral within a moral there), had he doomed himself? Then that ties into his realisation, death is inevitable, he could sit and wait forever and yes, his enemy would die eventually, but he is able to see the possible price of that, without having to experience it. Then the exchange with his daughter, and the family focus there. I very much like the ending, that in meditating on waiting for his situation to resolve itself, he came across the real answer he needed, and returned home to his family.