Celadons: Finish the Story Contest #61

in #finishthestory5 years ago

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The story begins with @brisby's evocative narrative:


Skin Deep

by @Brisby

"Our company stands by our satisfaction guarantee!" beamed the processing clerk with her row of brilliant white teeth.

Arnav returned her smile with a tight one of his own. That hadn't answered his question. Before he could repeat it again, the woman raised a pale green arm and gestured to the hallway on her left.

"Please proceed to the end of the hall to begin your procedure. We thank you for choosing DermaTru." Shimmering, the glass partition darkened as she turned from the console. Punctuating a blunt end to the transaction.

Arnav blinked, debating if he should knock on the blackened separator to demand a better response. Anxiety from the thought of creating a scene thrummed a timpani beneath his ribs. Lara would never forgive him for an embarrassing display in public. Besides, the blatant avoidance of his concerns had told him what he needed to know. There wouldn't be any going back.

Flickering screens aligning the hall were alight with a dazzling rainbow of customers. Each one a testimonial touting appreciation and joy for their operations. Waiting beside the iridescent number four in line, Arnav focused on one he hadn't seen before. A teary-eyed blue woman, Bonnie, was thanking DermaTru for giving her back her life.

"After my accident, I hid away." Sympathetic music underscored the images of a crumpled car and her body mottled with burn scars. "People would stare at me in the stores. I couldn't stand the looks in their eyes." The music swelled into inspirational notes as she continued, "Then I found DermaTru." Azure hands clasped over her heart as she stared from the screen, "They gave me more than the skin of my dreams, they gave me my life back."

A pneumatic hiss drew his attention as the door next to the screen slid open. Arnav's stomach flipped, readying to paint the floor with its own colorful mix of pastrami and bile. Closing his eyes, he forced down the nausea with measured breaths. There wasn't a reason to get himself worked up over this. There hadn't been a single case reported of nanite rejection. It was a simple and safe procedure performed by professionals.

His tremoring hands and quaking knees refused to acknowledge his attempts to calm himself. How like his life, even his own body ignored him.

But, all that would change after today. One quick injection and Arnav would have his wife smiling at him again. His Lara would be happy again. His hands fisted. He could do anything so long as it was for her. His knees eased their quivering. Anything to have her look at him again with something other than disappointment. His eyes opened.

Rallied by the thought of seeing love in Lara's eyes, Arnav stepped forward into the implantation room.

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The story ends with my dark interpretation:

Celadons

by @agmoore

They had met in the Resistance. Her passion was greater than his. But so long as he was willing to follow her lead, she could accept his passivity. However, as years passed, his complacency grated on her. Resentment grew. Not until the children were born, however, did resentment turn to contempt.

He wanted the children to be safe, to be indoctrinated and absorbed into the system. She wanted them to be taught alternatives, to become part of the Resistance. He could not risk the children. She was willing to risk everything.

The chasm between Lara and Arnav loomed like a voracious black hole. Love was beyond reclamation. Until now. Now he had the opportunity to redeem himself.

Biologists in the Resistance had been working on a serum. It would destroy the Celadons, the green-hued members of the ruling caste. What the Resistance needed was a cadre of dedicated agents who would volunteer to be instruments of biological warfare. The volunteers would have to submit themselves to the DermaTru procedure. Once the nanites were injected, these particles would act as catalysts for release of deadly hepatic antigens. Deadly to anyone who carried the Celadon mutation.

Of course, the volunteers were doomed. The internal process of converting the serum would be catastrophic in their own bodies. Their livers would disintegrate when the catalysed serum attacked the biliary ducts. For it was these ducts that were source of Celadon green.

Generations before, benign mutation of an essential biliary duct gene had led to the greenish hue of the Celadons. This mutation first appeared among a few children who belonged to the ruling elite. In order to protect their children from ostracism, the elite declared green complexion to be an advancement in human development, a sign from nature that the first Celadons were favored.

The mutated gene was dominant, so the number of Celadons rapidly multiplied. Gradually, green-hued Celadons separated themselves from the Pale. A generalized segregation arose ,until it was impossible for the Pale to live in certain neighborhoods, go to certain schools, rise above a certain station in business or government.

If green was the only thing that separated the privileged from the underclass, then green could be monetized. It could be induced, artificially, and overnight, lives would be changed. Pedigree papers could be falsified, for a fee.

Green clinics became an underground industry. Palms were greased. Authorities looked away. Rumors spread about deaths and disfigurements. But no official reports were filed, because technically, the clinics didn't exist.

Arnav braced himself for the nanite injection. He knew, if he was lucky, he might see Lara once more before he died. But that would be with dignity, and love restored. She had encouraged him to volunteer.

Biliary catalysis would take place a few hours after infusion. All across the land, volunteers were submitting to the same procedure. They would be released into the population at the same time. This sudden, overwhelming attack by germ warfare would exterminate the Celadons.

The Pale would rise up, and rule, as was their right.

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It was a delight to write this edition of #finishthestory, to come up with an idea worthy of @brisby's beginning. She threw us a thoughtful piece, that was also very entertaining. My idea was formed almost immediately, but life intruded and prevented me from posting. I'm up against a deadline :))

Please take the time to read the other entries in this week's contest. The authors have applied themselves with originality and skill. It's an honor to be among them.

The contest is sponsored by @bananafish. There's a style of story to suit anyone's interest. Try it sometime. You'll have fun.

Sort:  

Beautiful! The nerves are hit and the mind is aroused!

A completely stupid conduct to kill oneself with such a treatment, only to get back the love of a person. Which, of course, is not love at all. Very unsympathetic how people behave in your story. I suppose it's a little bit coinage on what mass stupidities peoples can commit and do it in the name of a Resistance that ennobles their intentions? Sacrificing oneself for something that causes the death of others is certainly a phenomenon that we know of, but fortunately does not occur too often. It reminds me of National Socialism, the Nazi-German Reich.

Love with conditions is quite repulsive and I think you have described this cow trade very well and the illusion that with a sacrifice you will get what you want. Probably the opposite.

I find your play with skin colours successful, because it reminds me of racial discrimination to tinker with genetic manipulations of illegal attempts with human genome. It should prevent us from wanting or doing such things :)

My dear friend Erika,
You see right through to my intention. @brisby's story brought these ideas to the fore. So many ideas to touch on in 500 words! Extremism, for one. Sacrificing life for an idea. Then the stratification of society by superficial external differences. Love, as you say, with conditions, with the loss of dignity and even self.

The fun part was to credibly weave science fiction elements into the plot.

I love stories that allow me to explore. And I love readers who see what I'm doing. Thanks for your endorsement and for this very insightful comment. It makes me happy to see your name here 🙂

Your good friend,
AG

I admire your consistency in sticking with what you have found here and staying true to your favorite themes and people. Though the activity is low here and the price went down, you don't care! That is such a good inspiration and reason for me to be further around and do as you do.

If it wasn't for you I maybe would limiting my blogging even more. I noticed that many of the bloggers have stopped publishing and it's a little sad to see that. Sometimes I think if it wasn't for the hope of being voted/payed it would be better. :)) But then nothing of this would have come into life.

How is your health? I hope, you are doing fine.

Hug you!
Yours Erika

I'm glad I encourage you to stay by my enthusiasm for blogging. If it weren't for Steemit, you and I would never have met. What a loss! Since I've come to Steemit I've learned how to make GIFs. My German and Spanish skills have been partially resurrected. I'm learning science and have honed my writing skills. The price is down, but the value is up. With each contact I find more contacts. Steemit is like a mine with rich ore. The more I poke around, the more I find.

You have been a source of inspiration for me, also. Your blogs are unique, your voice determined and strong. And you try to reach out to different kinds of bloggers on the platform. I respect that so much.

I'm having fun. As long as my health allows me to pursue my interests, I assess it to be fine 😃

I'm going over to your Italy travel blog now. I will enjoy those pictures once again and respond to your comment.

Warm regards and affection,
AG

It's true. It's true. Blogging here on Steemit is so personal and connecting. Compared to my previous blog, where the exchange had been much more impersonal. I feel like you, I have learned many new skills here and hopefully improved my English too:) Sometimes I wish that we could meet in nature. And drink tea together and have a nice chat. But I don't complain!
Thank you for your compliments, I am very happy and I see that you have similarly broad interests.

Can't wait to read your next blog ;-)
your friend E.

A virtual gift for you :)
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:-D Thank you for those flowers! I love it!

First of all...BLUSH!!!! This story is beyond worthy and I'm honored again to have a talented friend write along with me. 😁 You've elevated the story to another level Agmoore!

I'd love to read more tales from this world you've created. Should you choose, this could become quite a series! The Celadons, the Resistance against them, the backstory to the creation of DermaTru, the real reason for the creation of the nanites as catalysts, and the ultimate fate of the volunteers gives so much weight to Arnav's decision. This is his story but its scope is far beyond him.

Not only that, it completely spins everything from the beginning from being a tale of vanity and love to the ramifications of political choice and devotion. You've kept Arnav's character true throughout, concisely painted a reality where this situation could occur, and had me able to see his wife in a different light than simply a woman concerned more with appearance than her husband. I've no liking for Lara (you wrote her wonderfully and as such I've a strong reaction to her). I can respect her choices and beliefs but to use Arnav's deep infatuation for her to urge him to 'volunteer' for her sake instead of his own is something I find repugnant. (Even if it was to help bring about the end to the ruling caste.)

In the end, it is difficult to wish for the success of this resistance. Their motivations weren't for equality for both the Celadons and the Pales. In the end, it was just to replace those in power with another group that felt they were more worthy to rule. (See how you get me invested in your stories? 😄)

Thank you friend. I'd have to be pretty under the weather to pass up one of your stories. My husband agrees (he's not always agreeable) that your stories are entertaining and well written. After he finished reading our combined effort this week, he said, "That's something you would read in a book." Believe me, he doesn't lavish praise.

BTW, I forgot to use my new logo at the end of the story. I think you'll like it:


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Steem on!

Wow!
This is awesome, what a great way to start Saturday morning. Coffee, and your not-so-beautiful story!

And what a way to end my day! Walk in the door and find your wonderful comment. Thank you!!

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