JAMES BONG: Agent Of Anarchy - Episode 5 - Part 2

In the exciting conclusion to Episode 5, Bong goes deeper into the dark recesses of the rabbit hole.

Scene 1

Bong is driving his 3D printed 1977 Black Trans Am en route to Dulles Airport in the DC area.  He’s having a chat with K before attending Miss Moneybit’s big TSA confrontation event.

Bong:  Moneybit doesn’t know I’m coming, right?
K:  Of course not.  You know how well I keep secrets.

Bong:  Which is why I asked again.    
K:  More importantly, we finally got a lead on Prince.

Bong:  About time you delivered.
K:  And not just Prince, either.  It appears that we have an ominous continuity.

Bong:  Explain.
K:  So I intercepted a message from the bug in General Small’s office.  Looks like Hugo Trax is going to L.A. today.  And guess who showed up in L.A. yesterday? Ty Prince.  How about that?

Bong:  Looks like I need to get going quick then.
K:  You gotta watch Moneybit’s back first, though, ok?

Bong (reluctantly):  I suppose.  I’m at the airport.  Gotta go.

Bong puts his iris-changing contacts on so the iris scanners won’t recognize him.  He quickly makes his way to the designated checkpoint where Moneybit’s show is about to begin.  While waiting near the checkpoint, he spots a throng of at least 100 people walking confidently towards the area.  Leading the pack is Miss Moneybit.  

Bong eyes the 6 TSA order-following dupes, who have no idea what they’re in for.  Moneybit and another 10 people walk in lockstep at the front as the TSA goons try to stop them and ask for ID and tickets.  The goons are ignored and are quickly passed by.  After a moment, one of the goons panics and tries to grab one of the free humans.    

TSA goon:  Stop, stop! I command you to stop!   

Everyone ignores the goon and continues to walk through the feeble checkpoint.  Suddenly, 4 individuals wearing black hoodies in the middle of the pack start throwing rocks at the TSA agents.  Chaos ensues.

Bong (to himself):  Agent provocateurs!

The TSA goons start cowering behind the naked body scanners and start calling for police intervention on their radios.    

Bong runs into the pack and knocks out two of the black block provocateurs with one thunderous roundhouse.  He then kicks another one in the testicles, and drops the fourth and final one with a knee to the skull.  A handful of badge-wearing, order-following parasites in blue start running to the scene.  The protesters continue to march through the checkpoint undeterred.  

Bong spots Moneybit, who is panic stricken and confused just past the checkpoint.  Bong bursts through the chaotic mess of bodies, grabs Moneybit by the arm, and the two sprint away from the area.  One police goon chases them, but fails to reach them before Bong and Moneybit are safely cruising away in Bong’s Trans Am. 

Moneybit (shrieking):  What the hell are you doing?
Bong:  Saving your arse.  Thanks for the gratitude.

Moneybit:  What?
Bong:  Don’t you get it?  Did you forget that you’re being watched by Small and Trax? They’ve been waiting for you to screw up, and now you’ve done those tools a favor.    

Moneybit:  What the hell happened back there?
Bong:  Agent provocateurs attacking the TSA goons, that’s what.  And now they’re gonna put out a narrative that you led a violent revolt against the TSA.  I knew this was a bad idea.

Moneybit:  Where are we going?
Bong (wryly):  I’m gonna put you on a plane to your destination of choice.  Might I suggest Acapulco? I know a pasty little nerd that’ll wet his pants if you do.

Moneybit (incredulous):  You’ve got to be kidding! I’m going home!
Bong:  There are at least a dozen order-following little dogs at your house right now, guaranteed, just waiting to throw you in a cage.

Moneybit:  I can’t just leave the country.
Bong:  I can’t afford to lose you.

Moneybit (gushy and googly eyed):  Awww, that’s so sweet.
Bong:  You’re too valuable of an asset.

Moneybit (huffy, sarcastic):  You’re so sentimental.
Bong:  Take a picture of my eyes.

Moneybit:  What? Why?

Bong:  I got the iris prints of the agent provocateurs stored in my contacts.  Get the prints to K.  It might be useful to identify them.  (Bong hands a smartphone to Moneybit) Here, take this and get a private flight to Acapulco booked ASAP.  Use Swarm City so it can be anonymous.  I’ve gotta get to L.A.   

Moneybit:  L.A.? What’s going on, Bong?
Bong (smirking gruffly):  Ominous continuity.  Get ready for a big story. 

An hour later, Bong drops Moneybit at a private airfield in rural Virginia for her flight to Acapulco.

Moneybit:  This is crazy.    
Bong:  Welcome to my life.  Tell your boyfriend I said hello.

Moneybit:  I hate you, Bong.

Moneybit boards the plane and takes off.  Bong proceeds to a different airfield to pick up a private plane and fly himself to L.A.

Scene 2

Now after sunset, James Bong is walking from his private plane to his new 3D printed midnight blue car modeled after the 1986 Ferrari Testarossa.  He calls K.

Bong:  Ok, K, where’s Prince at? Being in L.A. makes me nauseous due to its overt oozing of evil.
K:  What I’m about to tell you isn’t going to help your severe allergy to evil.

Bong (takes deep breath):  Lay it on me.  I’m ready.
K:  Ty Prince is in Beverly Hills.

Bong:  Beverly Hills is fairly large.  Do you think we can narrow that down a bit?
K:  You didn’t let me finish.  He’s at Kevin Spacey’s house.

Bong:  Bullocks.
K:  Not joking.  You have your cameras ready?   

Bong:  One on each shoulder.
K: Can you get an autograph for me?

Bong (gruff):  I’m replacing you as soon as possible. (click)

Scene 3

Bong is squatting behind some obelisk-shaped hedges in Kevin Spacey’s yard.  He watches through a window by zooming in with his special iris-scanning contacts.  He sees Ty Prince, Kevin Spacey, Harvey Weinstein, and Sir Hugo Trax drinking cocktails and lounging in overstuffed leather thrones.    

Prince:  Hugo, you get first pick.
Spacey:  You G-men always stick together, don’t you.  Why can’t I have first pick for once?

Weinstein:  We could draw straws or something.
Trax:  Or maybe Kev would prefer a sword-fighting tournament? 

Spacey:  Low blow, even for you, Trax.

Prince nods to a bulky order-follower in a black suit.  The order-follower opens the door next to him, goes downstairs, and returns a moment later with a 12-year-old girl.

Trax (waving her away):  No, no, not a chance.  Look at that blemish on her cheek.  Not a chance, no.
Spacey:  Old Harv will take her.  He takes anything with a pulse.

Trax:  Can’t we just go and have a look at all of them together? I mean, really.  This isn’t a damned pageant.    

All keep silent and raise eyebrows.

Trax:  Great, then. It’s settled.
Spacey: To the magic dungeon!

All four stand up and start to walk downstairs.  Bong takes the opportunity to enter the house.  He stealthily gets to the top of the stairs and has a birds-eye view of the group.  He is appalled by the scene.  There are at least 20 drugged-up, naked girls in cages between the ages of 10 and 16.    

Trax:  Prince, my boy, you’ve outdone yourself this time.
Prince:  I thought it was a good haul.

Spacey:  Can we sample before we buy?
Prince:  You know the rules.

Trax (pointing):  That dark skinned one there, where is she from?
Prince:  Venezuela.

Trax:  And the blond with the icy blue eyes?
Prince:  Russia.

Trax:  Saved from war torn areas, what a hero you are, Prince.  Those two will do nicely.  What about the youngest ones? Where are they from?   

Prince:  US of A.  Homegrown talent.
Weinstein:  They can understand what we’re saying? You fool!

Trax: Calm down.  They’ll just have to be eliminated after they serve their purpose.  But you really shouldn’t get English speakers, you know.  It’s an unnecessary risk.

Prince (shrugging shoulders):  My contact at CPS gave me an offer I couldn’t refuse.
Trax:  How much for the four, then? 

Prince:  20 million.
Trax:  The money and transport will be here in an hour.

Weinstein:  Leaving so soon?
Trax:  I have a real job, unlike you.

Bong pulls out some canisters of aerosolized THC, opens them, and holds the door shut.

Spacey (alarmed):  You boys here something?

The gas spreads quickly and soon all in the dungeon are knocked out.  After waiting a few minutes for the air to clear, Bong hurries downstairs and ties up the criminals.  He then uses his smart devices.  He uses the Sub-Stratum network, SteemPay, and Swarm City to arrange drone delivery of clothing for the girls to Spacey’s house.  He also arranges a transport bus and a cargo plane.  The clothing arrives in less than an hour, just as everyone starts to wake from the THC-induced slumber.  Bong starts handing clothes out to the girls, most of whom are too scared to speak.  The criminals also awaken but cannot speak because their mouths are taped up.

Trax (muffled, trying to yell at Bong):  Bmmmmph!

Bong:  Hello, Mr. Trax.  You said that the 20 million will be arriving soon? What should I do with it? Should I burn it? Should I allow the girls to take it? Comments? (Bong laughs to himself at Trax’s inability to speak)

Bong:  Tell me, Trax, do you know the difference between right and wrong? No, I know you don’t. Why? Number one, because of your actions.  And number two, because you’re an evil statist tool.   

Bong checks his smartwatch and runs up the stairs, then outside to see what vehicles have arrived.  A limo is pulling slowly up the driveway.  Bong waits out of sight, then pounces on the driver.  He knocks out the driver with a left hook and grabs the briefcase of cash next to the driver.  The transport van that Bong ordered pulls up moments later.  Bong runs back to the dungeon.

Bong:  Girls, you can fly with me to safety, or you can stay here with these criminals.  The choice is yours.  

The girls follow Bong.  They drive to a private airfield outside the city where the cargo plane is waiting.  Bong flies through the night and arrives in Acapulco at dawn.

Bong:  This is where we part ways, girls.  You’re free.  Divide the money and start a new life, if you wish.    

The oldest girl, all of 16, speaks up.

Girl:  That’s it? You’re leaving us?   
Bong (uncertain what to do):  Well, I can’t take care of you.

Girl:  What are we supposed to do?
Bong (reluctantly):  I suppose you can come with me and we’ll figure something out.    

20 minutes later at K’s place, Miss Moneybit and K are chatting in K’s living room/hacker lair. 

Miss Moneybit:  Do you hear something?

Bong is outside picking the lock.

Symphy:  There is an intruder at the door.    
K:  Bong!

K runs to the door to surprise Bong.

K:  Surprise!
Bong:  What the hell?

K (smug):  You can’t get past Symphy.  Besides, can’t you just knock?
Bong:  Old habits die hard.  We’ve got visitors.

K looks in the background and sees the large group of young girls.

K:  Looks like you’ve got one hell of a story.
Bong:  That’s just getting started.

End Episode 5 

Thanks for your time and attention!

Top image is from pixabay