[Short Story] The day my life went off the rails. Part III
This is part III of a short story you can read the other parts here:
Part I: https://steemit.com/fiction/@lauralemons/short-story-the-day-my-life-went-off-the-rails-part-i
Part II: https://steemit.com/fiction/@lauralemons/short-story-the-day-my-life-went-off-the-rails-part-ii
I was terrified as I was escorted into the mental institution.
I was brough in and greeted by the night workers. I could hear them laughing and talking loudly on my walk up. They all looked no older than me and I was surprised as to how casual and happy they seemed. Like, this was a part-time job they could care less about. I guess I expected something a bit more personal, serious. How was this place supposed to help me? It was late at night and they said they had no beds, they seemed surprised I was arriving. Didn't they get notified of this stuff?
Eventually they found a matress and threw it on the floor in the main room. They said they would find me a roommmate the next day and to just sleep there for now. The driver left without me noticing and there I was, with a mattress and a group of loud 20 somethings, "watching over me". I lay down but didn't want to go to sleep. I didn't want to wake up to this place. I was scared. I was no longer crying or even holding back tears but I was scared still. The workers were all laughing and talking about their day. It all seemed surreal. I wished I could rewind time and go back to before the train. Go back to having a normal day just like them. But here I was, on a questionable mattress, with no sheet, in the common room of a mental institution. Was this where I belonged?
At some point I must have fallen asleep.
I woke up with one of the workers asking me to get out of bed. People were already out of their rooms, I had slept through it. "Okay" I said and stumbled out of bed. I asked where a bathroom was and chubby, blonde worker disinterestedly pointed toward a hallway. I was scared but I really needed to pee. I hadn't since the hospital. I wasn't sure where to go during the night and was afraid to ask anyone. I made my way to a white and grey bathroom. There weren't stalls, just toilets and sinks but my bladder was full enough that the lack of privacy didn't matter. I went to wash my hands and there was no soap. I rinsed with luke-warm water, and left the bathroom.
I was expecting some sort of guidance when I woke up but I got none. When I got out of the bathroom the mattress was moved and the common room was very full with people. Crazy people, I thought. I looked around the room, through all of the commotion and overwhelming noise, and tried to figure out where to sit. This felt a little bit like high-school, only somehow even worse. I spotted two elderly women sitting on opposite sides a couch, they both looked disheveled, their long gray hair a mess, and they were both starting at a TV that wasn't turned on as if it was the most entertaining thing they'd seen in years. I heard a fight going on by the table on the other side of the room and heard a lot of screaming in general. I didn't want to be the target of any anger, didn't want any trouble so I took a seat in the middle of the dingy olive screen couch and stared at the TV like it was the best thing I'd seen in years.
I am not sure how long I sat there like that but it felt like many hours but without my phone or laptop there was no concept of time. There were no clocks on the wall that I spotted but I was intentionally trying to just stare at the black screen. I wanted to blend in with these crazy, grey-haired women that I was sandwiched between. I didn't want to be over where chair were being thrown and patients were being man-handled. Maybe if I just acted really crazy I would avoid any trouble. I wanted to get out of here but I also wanted to stay safe and I wasn't sure where to draw the line or where the line even was for that matter. I just knew that staring at this black screen was the easiest, and least stressful thing to do for right now, while I gathered myself, and learned about my surroundings.
Photos:
You have to watch the TV.... If you don't they never let you out and you become a psych drug test dummy transferred from ward to ward for years just to generate profit for the state extortionists(contractors). Thats what I thought my first time I got society blocked anyway, the second time was less nerve-wracking and I made some friends there, I could be one of those "crazy people" maniacally laughing in the back of this or any number of stories like this on the internet.
The Disease of Political Correctness (Featuring @kyriacos as author)
8 hours ago by dragonslayer10967 in anarchy
Defining Hypocrisy
Political Correctness is the way we treat each other in order to avoid being offensive. The term fails since being offensive is something subjective that depends on one’s culture, ethics and personal experiences. Nonetheless many people are drawn towards this form of behaviour. Learning how to speak and act properly in order to be accepted comes hand in hand with ideas of positive thinking, positive energy and other self worshipping illusions. No wonder “The Secret” was such a hit of a book. The comfiness of modern life has soften our character. Even if we are going through so-called ‘economic crises’, here in the west we have a place to sleep, food to eat and water to drink—something that billions cannot enjoy on a daily basis. Most people on this planet struggle in terms of life or death in order to survive. I wonder how many “positive energy” individuals have the balls to preach to a starving child in Africa that his situation is such because he attracts “negative energy”. This is not only bullshit but downright inhumane.
Self Destruction
We have managed to incorporate this politically correct mantra in our relationships and managed to reinforce it through cosmopolitan level articles that urge us to detox our social life from all this negativity or what it comes to be—reality itself. The trend is sculpting people who are way too sensitive with everything that goes on with their lives. We are nourishing our inner Paris Hilton so others can cater to out “positivism”. I wonder, why after so much positivism we are still popping up pills like M&M’s?
The News and Social Media have changed their rules of conduct, removing all “negative commentary”. We demand this new lingo so much that our friends, coworkers and even politicians and leaders have become liars, hypocrites and crooks. The average perception craves political correctness and this is exactly what we are getting.
It has become a symbol, a flag. There is surge of group creation across all domains. People are demanding “rights” as if one group suffers more than the other. One group ends ups We end up stripping the freedoms from another for the sake of security, imprisoning each other under the shackles of governmental control. Why do you think humans suffer so much from loneliness even if we are connected than ever? Why do you think we visit therapists to talk about identity crisis or our problems with the rest of the world? We wear so many politically correct masks that we have lost track with reality. “Positive Energy” as if life is the green valley with my little pony. We have become spoiled brats accusing the world for “patriarchy” “sexism” “human rights” “corruption” “fat shaming” turning all the arguments against one another since everybody carries their own ideology. What a circus. Nobody can take any offense anymore.
Wake Up Call
I understand that we have always wore some kind of mask and behaved in some kind of politically correct way more or less. Nobody denies this. As humans living in complex societies this is rather a necessity. Today though the phenomenon has turned people against their own self. We might see for example a group of 5 people sitting in a coffee shop sunked in their mobile screens liking each others’ posts as if all that takes place in another dimension. Turn your head some degrees left and you witness a girl taking 500 selfies on her balcony so that she can choose the best one; gathering the maximum amount of likes-even if she knows that she doesn’t look like that in real life. And then we wonder why we pop pills and complain why people cannot see “who we truly are”. We are committing personality suicides. We sacrifice our identity in order to become accepted. We sacrifice our freedom of expression for the sake of safety. We demand only positive things, shoving reality under the carpet whether that is the TV, social media and magic pills. The very profession of the psychologist exists because we cannot be real with any other. Therapists are friends on payroll. We wouldn’t want to cause any “negativity” in our friend circle or show any form of “weakness”. right? We have become an avatar, a by-product of political correctness. One can either be real and suffer the social consequences or forever absorbed into the this ocean of absurdity.
@kyriacos
Interesting and haunting!
Thank you. Stay tuned. :]
The Disease of Political Correctness (Featuring @kyriacos as author)
8 hours ago by dragonslayer10967 in anarchy
Defining Hypocrisy
Political Correctness is the way we treat each other in order to avoid being offensive. The term fails since being offensive is something subjective that depends on one’s culture, ethics and personal experiences. Nonetheless many people are drawn towards this form of behaviour. Learning how to speak and act properly in order to be accepted comes hand in hand with ideas of positive thinking, positive energy and other self worshipping illusions. No wonder “The Secret” was such a hit of a book. The comfiness of modern life has soften our character. Even if we are going through so-called ‘economic crises’, here in the west we have a place to sleep, food to eat and water to drink—something that billions cannot enjoy on a daily basis. Most people on this planet struggle in terms of life or death in order to survive. I wonder how many “positive energy” individuals have the balls to preach to a starving child in Africa that his situation is such because he attracts “negative energy”. This is not only bullshit but downright inhumane.
Self Destruction
We have managed to incorporate this politically correct mantra in our relationships and managed to reinforce it through cosmopolitan level articles that urge us to detox our social life from all this negativity or what it comes to be—reality itself. The trend is sculpting people who are way too sensitive with everything that goes on with their lives. We are nourishing our inner Paris Hilton so others can cater to out “positivism”. I wonder, why after so much positivism we are still popping up pills like M&M’s?
The News and Social Media have changed their rules of conduct, removing all “negative commentary”. We demand this new lingo so much that our friends, coworkers and even politicians and leaders have become liars, hypocrites and crooks. The average perception craves political correctness and this is exactly what we are getting.
It has become a symbol, a flag. There is surge of group creation across all domains. People are demanding “rights” as if one group suffers more than the other. One group ends ups We end up stripping the freedoms from another for the sake of security, imprisoning each other under the shackles of governmental control. Why do you think humans suffer so much from loneliness even if we are connected than ever? Why do you think we visit therapists to talk about identity crisis or our problems with the rest of the world? We wear so many politically correct masks that we have lost track with reality. “Positive Energy” as if life is the green valley with my little pony. We have become spoiled brats accusing the world for “patriarchy” “sexism” “human rights” “corruption” “fat shaming” turning all the arguments against one another since everybody carries their own ideology. What a circus. Nobody can take any offense anymore.
Wake Up Call
I understand that we have always wore some kind of mask and behaved in some kind of politically correct way more or less. Nobody denies this. As humans living in complex societies this is rather a necessity. Today though the phenomenon has turned people against their own self. We might see for example a group of 5 people sitting in a coffee shop sunked in their mobile screens liking each others’ posts as if all that takes place in another dimension. Turn your head some degrees left and you witness a girl taking 500 selfies on her balcony so that she can choose the best one; gathering the maximum amount of likes-even if she knows that she doesn’t look like that in real life. And then we wonder why we pop pills and complain why people cannot see “who we truly are”. We are committing personality suicides. We sacrifice our identity in order to become accepted. We sacrifice our freedom of expression for the sake of safety. We demand only positive things, shoving reality under the carpet whether that is the TV, social media and magic pills. The very profession of the psychologist exists because we cannot be real with any other. Therapists are friends on payroll. We wouldn’t want to cause any “negativity” in our friend circle or show any form of “weakness”. right? We have become an avatar, a by-product of political correctness. One can either be real and suffer the social consequences or forever absorbed into the this ocean of absurdity.
@kyriacos
Yeah... Kinda hard to navigate your way around, with nothing but crazy and seemingly dangerous people, everywhere. I never made it the mental ward but I've spent a few nights in the tank (jail). A definite lack of any sort of guidance. Welcome to the system! Cheers, @lauralemons :))
I was baker acted in FL but only was there overnight and then they let me out. :) But it was definitely disorganized af for that night.
Now I get the alcoholism... :)) -- Cheers @lauralemons like reading your stuff. And Im glad it was only one night!!!
The Disease of Political Correctness (Featuring @kyriacos as author)
8 hours ago by dragonslayer10967 in anarchy
Defining Hypocrisy
Political Correctness is the way we treat each other in order to avoid being offensive. The term fails since being offensive is something subjective that depends on one’s culture, ethics and personal experiences. Nonetheless many people are drawn towards this form of behaviour. Learning how to speak and act properly in order to be accepted comes hand in hand with ideas of positive thinking, positive energy and other self worshipping illusions. No wonder “The Secret” was such a hit of a book. The comfiness of modern life has soften our character. Even if we are going through so-called ‘economic crises’, here in the west we have a place to sleep, food to eat and water to drink—something that billions cannot enjoy on a daily basis. Most people on this planet struggle in terms of life or death in order to survive. I wonder how many “positive energy” individuals have the balls to preach to a starving child in Africa that his situation is such because he attracts “negative energy”. This is not only bullshit but downright inhumane.
Self Destruction
We have managed to incorporate this politically correct mantra in our relationships and managed to reinforce it through cosmopolitan level articles that urge us to detox our social life from all this negativity or what it comes to be—reality itself. The trend is sculpting people who are way too sensitive with everything that goes on with their lives. We are nourishing our inner Paris Hilton so others can cater to out “positivism”. I wonder, why after so much positivism we are still popping up pills like M&M’s?
The News and Social Media have changed their rules of conduct, removing all “negative commentary”. We demand this new lingo so much that our friends, coworkers and even politicians and leaders have become liars, hypocrites and crooks. The average perception craves political correctness and this is exactly what we are getting.
It has become a symbol, a flag. There is surge of group creation across all domains. People are demanding “rights” as if one group suffers more than the other. One group ends ups We end up stripping the freedoms from another for the sake of security, imprisoning each other under the shackles of governmental control. Why do you think humans suffer so much from loneliness even if we are connected than ever? Why do you think we visit therapists to talk about identity crisis or our problems with the rest of the world? We wear so many politically correct masks that we have lost track with reality. “Positive Energy” as if life is the green valley with my little pony. We have become spoiled brats accusing the world for “patriarchy” “sexism” “human rights” “corruption” “fat shaming” turning all the arguments against one another since everybody carries their own ideology. What a circus. Nobody can take any offense anymore.
Wake Up Call
I understand that we have always wore some kind of mask and behaved in some kind of politically correct way more or less. Nobody denies this. As humans living in complex societies this is rather a necessity. Today though the phenomenon has turned people against their own self. We might see for example a group of 5 people sitting in a coffee shop sunked in their mobile screens liking each others’ posts as if all that takes place in another dimension. Turn your head some degrees left and you witness a girl taking 500 selfies on her balcony so that she can choose the best one; gathering the maximum amount of likes-even if she knows that she doesn’t look like that in real life. And then we wonder why we pop pills and complain why people cannot see “who we truly are”. We are committing personality suicides. We sacrifice our identity in order to become accepted. We sacrifice our freedom of expression for the sake of safety. We demand only positive things, shoving reality under the carpet whether that is the TV, social media and magic pills. The very profession of the psychologist exists because we cannot be real with any other. Therapists are friends on payroll. We wouldn’t want to cause any “negativity” in our friend circle or show any form of “weakness”. right? We have become an avatar, a by-product of political correctness. One can either be real and suffer the social consequences or forever absorbed into the this ocean of absurdity.
@kyriacos
You're a great writer leaves me wanting to read more
OMG Laura is posting in the fiction tag
things are changing...