Challenge #02553-F363: Here There Be Sock Puppets

in #fiction4 years ago (edited)

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An enemy deathworlder, a xenophobe, constantly making life hell for the havenworlders around them. A general, proud, fierce, having suffered many tortures and never once broke, always escaped. But now, they were being held by humans. Pain meant nothing to them. When asked about the movements of new weaponry, the answer was always a snark and the spitting or words "Do your worst, I'll never say a word, you'll have to kill me."
The humans bring in what they call the 3rd degree. Several gasping, saying that's far too inhumane. How could they do that to any cognisant?? The humans reply they are running out of time and lives are at stake. The alien smirks, he'll never break, ever, no matter how much they strike at him, surely that simple brown box holds sharp blades and poisons, right? Then, as the box opens to reveal a simple doll, a puppet caricature of a lamb, and it's set right by the speaker leading into his prison, a song begins... "This is the song that never ends...it goes on and on my friends, some people started singing it not knowing what it was, but they will keep on singing it forever just because... this is the song that never ends... it goes on and on....." -- Anon Guest

[AN: Thanks, Nonny, for the Youtube link to ten hours of that nonsense. I only watched one loop for curiosity's sake so ner]

Good news, they captured a Vorax Ur-king. Great news, they potentially knew everything about his horde's movements and plans. Bad news, the Ur-king wasn't talking. They were closed-mouthed and arrogant with it. "I'll never talk," said the Ur-king, who wouldn't even give their name. "You will not get any information about my horde or myself out of me. Waste all your resources. Try subjecting me to pain. Waste every minute of every day. Deprive me of anything you can think of. It would be faster to kill me."

The attending Humans seemed unimpressed. The Havenworlders sighed and said, "Very well. Please remember that we did give you this chance." Then they left the Ur-king alone in a room with two Humans, who started to smirk.

"Well, well, well, Mx Jones... They said they weren't going to talk. We might as well skip ahead and subject them to Lambchop."

"Lambchop's a little extreme, don't you think? The CRC have red-flagged it, Mx Smith."

The Ur-king gurgled, which was something of a Vorax chuckle. "You are trying to intimidate me," they said. "You try to make me fear the unknown. I would dive into a black hole to see what is there! You cannot make me fear."

"Seems like they want us to test them, Mx Jones," said Smith.

"They have given us their consent, Mx Smith," said Jones.

"Then we shall proceed."

They made sure the Ur-king was comfortable in the restraints, dimmed the lights, and brought in a two-dimensional viewscreen from the darkened depths.

"Out of an understanding for your rights," said Jones, "we will be stopping every two hours to see to your biological needs."

"Only you have the power to make it stop permanently," said Smith. They touched a button and the image of... a sock-puppet in the parodical image of a Terran ungulate.

"The song that doesn't end," sang the creation, "It goes on and on my friends/ Some people started singing it not knowing what it was..."

The Ur-king stared in disbelief as the Humans left the room. "This is a child's entertainment! This is ridiculous. Who could possibly be harmed by this?"

At the first break, the Ur-king laughed as the Humans offered snacks, a bathroom break, and water. They laughed even harder as they left the room and left the floor to the singing sock puppet. The same was true for the second and third break. At the fourth, the Ur-king took the offered bathroom break.

It was at roughly Hour Ten that the song began to cut it. It was the monotonous cheerfulness in combination with the circular lyrics and the inability to detect where it was patched into a loop. It truly did not end, it faded into obscurity at the end of two hours, and worse... the music in the bathroom was an instrumental version of the same song.

There was no escape. Even when the Ur-king slept, the instrumental version, syrupy in its softness, kept playing. Infinitely.

They broke in less than a Standard Day. "My name is K'Thaan and I identify as male," he said, "I am Ur-king of fifty thousand Raids, and command two hundred thousand raider vessels. Our strike zones from most productive to least productive are..."

The Humans, watching in the booth above, bumped their fists.

"Lambchop," said Smith. "Works every time."

The Havenworlder supervisor shook their head, "I do not understand. That is the most harmless thing known to Deathworlders. Sock puppets... music... children's entertainment... How can this break the toughest of the tough?"

"Just be glad that we didn't give him Small world," said Jones. "They usually end up soiling themselves with Small World."

[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / Sudowoodo]

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LOL I saw your annotation to the anonymous. A youtube link for 10 hours of that? Heh, I'd be gnawing my own hand off to get away after the first hour. AAAAHHH!

That poor vorax ur-king never stood a chance!

RoFL!

And this

he music in the bathroom was an instrumental version of the same song.

There was no escape. Even when the Ur-king slept, the instrumental version, syrupy in its softness, kept playing. Infinitely.

was an awesomely special kind of cruel XD

Does it not affect Havenworlders or have they just not listened to the loop for hours? :D

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