Challenge #02531-F341: Conflict of InterestssteemCreated with Sketch.

in #fiction5 months ago

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Don’t worry we’re completely safe
explosion
Relatively safe
laughter in the distance
As long we don’t move from here, we’re safe
door flies open
I think it’s best if we leave -- Anon Guest

[AN: Nonny, you have hit one of my favourite tropes - the chain of circumstantial self-correction. I confess to laughing out loud]

There used to be two absolute certainties in the universe - death and taxes. However, after the Humans entered the Galactic awareness, three things were certain. Death, taxes, and unbelievable amounts of destruction when a Human was around. It didn't seem to matter whether or not the Human was on their side, there was just... devastation in their wake.

It took quite some time for the Galactic Alliance to collectively learn that not all Humans were like that, but their fearsome reputation had cemented itself by then. Of course, in the initial stages of introducing themselves to the Alliance, the kind of Humans who went out into strange new worlds and new civilisations were exactly the sorts of people for whom half a stick of dynamite was an ideal solution to most of life's problems.

This was merely a fine point of order to Grax, currently huddled in a Human Guide's arms in the middle of what sounded like a war zone. Neither of them had intended to be in a war zone, they had just happened to be performing archaeology in a continent that also had valuable limited mineral resources... that two other factions decided to have a battle over. Human Jess had been quick about finding a place of shelter, and insisted on shielding Grax with their body.

"Don't worry," said Jess. "We're completely safe."

In the distance -well- not very distant distance, someone detonated some ordinance.

"Relatively safe," Jess amended.

Not that far off, someone laughed. A very manic, very foreboding, Human laugh. Oh dear. Whoever they were, they had Humans too. The more... stereotypical kind of Humans. Grax shared a frightened look with Jess.

"As long as we don't give away our position, we should be safe."

"Some," sang a Human voice as they kicked open the door, "BODY once tole me..."

Human Jess swore, physically picking up Grax. "Oh, we've gotta go!"

Grax didn't remember most of their flight from the battle zone, since their anti-stress medication was the really good stuff, but the livesuit recordings told the tale of the true power of a Human's fight-or-flight instincts. Human Jess ran all the way back to the lander and lifted off into the lower stratosphere before they remembered to close the hatch.

Grax checked on them after the autodock had run its cycle. Human Jess was on the ground and panting.

"Sorry," they said. "I underestimated the situation. I forgot there's all kinds of contracts for all kinds of people by all kinds of people."

Grax checked to be certain Human Jess was approaching more normal health indicators. "Your job was to keep us safe. In that, you have succeeded. I thank you."

"Pity they're blowing up the archeology, though."

"That is a pity. However, we are alive to report it."

[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / guffoto]

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Bahahahahahahaaaa that's one of my favourite tropes too XD

Bit of a random song for the person busting in but I guess whatever works at the time? XD

Are Havenworlders normally tiny?

Humans have gotta meme and I thought the Shrek Door was a good goof at the time. Can't win 'em all.

As for Havenworlders - most of them are tiny, compared to Humans. Never underestimate adrenaline for the power to bodily pick up your friends and haul ass across country though.

I'm well familiar with that adrenaline. I once threw a queen-sized mattress off a toddler it had landed on. I don't remember it weighing anything at the time but also remember it took both me and my partner to move it and his shocked look XD